What's the difference between a washing machine and your mom?

The last time I dumped a load into the washing machine, she didn't follow me around for a week!

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Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What's the difference between your mom and the Empire State Building?

Not everyone's been up the Empire State Building

How do you tell the difference between a scientist and a plumber?

Ask them to pronounce unionized.

Mom Jokes More Mom Jokes

Why did the guy that owned a chocolate building bang his mom?

Because he had an edible complex.

What's the difference between my bike and your mom?

Your dad doesn't watch when I ride my bike.

Dump Jokes More Dump Jokes

Why don't they let Italians swim in Long Island Sound?

If you know that one, try this one: Why do seagulls fly to the dump

Why did Superman dump Lois for Wonder Woman?

He decided he wanted to date someone in the same League.

Follow Jokes More Follow Jokes

Who are all these people Twitter wants me to follow?

Has the fail whale been stalking me. Help, stranger danger!

What's the difference between a blond and a washing machine?

When you drop a load into a washing machine it doesn't follow you around for a week.

Week Jokes More Week Jokes

How would you improve our business?

Dude, I'd bankrupt you in a week. I'm just catchin Pokemon in your office."

What's an American's favourite day of the week?

Fryday.

Load Jokes More Load Jokes

What's the difference between a girl and a washing machine?

When I dump a load into the washing machine it doesn't follow me around

What about the two old ladies who brought a bottle of whiskey to the baseball game?

At the bottom of the fifth the bags were loaded.

Washing Machine Jokes More Washing Machine Jokes

What's the difference between a blond and a washing machine?

When you drop a load into a washing machine it doesn't follow you around for a week.

Whats the difference between a Blonde and a Washing Machine?

The Washing Machine will not follow you around for 2 weeks after you dump a load in it!