40 Year Old Jokes

What is it called when someone gives birth to a 40 year old man?

A midwife crisis

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Why couldn't Helen Keller vote?

She was a woman! And it wasn't until 1920 when the 19th Amendment was ratified. At this point she was 40 years old and could vote.

What is the difference between a single 40-year-old woman and a single 40-year-old man?

The 40-year-old woman thinks often of having children and the man thinks often about dating them.

How many years of experience do you have?

50 - Really You are 40 years old - I had lots of overtime

Why women mature faster than men?

Because men start growing breasts only after 40 years old.

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Birth Jokes More Birth Jokes

How can you tell that your dog just gave birth?

It is now a parent.

What day do most mothers give birth?

Labor day.

Date Jokes More Date Jokes

What would be a good dating site for rednecks ?

MyHeritage.com

What did the Baskin-Robbins manager say to the employee that wanted to date a co-worker?

Don't poop where you scoop.

Mature Jokes More Mature Jokes

What's the difference between men and government bonds?

Bonds mature.

What's the difference between a millennial and a mutual fund?

A mutual fund will eventually mature and make money

1920 Jokes More 1920 Jokes

Why couldn't Helen Keller vote?

She was a woman! And it wasn't until 1920 when the 19th Amendment was ratified. At this point she was 40 years old and could vote.

What do phone books and women have in common?

They both couldn't vote before 1920

Woman Jokes More Woman Jokes

What do you say to a woman with a black eye?

Nothing. She's already been told.

What's the first thing a woman does after leaving spousal abuse therapy?

The dishes, if she knows what's good for her!

Vote Jokes More Vote Jokes

What do feminists and Redditors have in common?

They both have multiple triggers that will cause them to down vote those who don't think the exact same way as them.

Which UK party will the sleeping pigs be voting for in May?

The Lay-Boar Party.

Start Jokes More Start Jokes

How do you know if a pepper is starting a fight with you?

It gets jalapeno face.

What's her name?

Me: I'm not telling you. Him: What does it start with at least Me:

Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What is the difference between a crazy bunny and a counterfeit banknote?

One is bad money and the other is a mad bunny!

What's the difference between Greece and a good software application?

Greece doesn't have default settings!