Checkmate Jokes

What is Checkmate?

You tell your Wife, "I saw a lady, looked exactly like you" Wife asks, "WAS SHE BEAUTIFUL?" You cant say 'NO' You cant say 'YES' That is Checkmate!

Couple's Daily Question Mug

Couple's Daily Question Mug

Coffee Mug

Why can't you checkmate a christian?

Because they're all pawns and their king doesn't exist.

How did the baker put his opponent in checkmate?

with an en croissant

What do you call it when you get stuck into a shotgun wedding with a Czech?

Checkmate!

Who ate all the cookies?

5-year-old: Ninjas. Me: I didn't see them. 5-year-old: No one ever does. Checkmate.

Who's there ! Checkmate ! Checkmate who ?

Checkmate bounce if you don't have money in the bank !

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Czech Jokes More Czech Jokes

What happened when the bankrupt eastern european jumped off a building?

The Czech bounced.

Who is the chess player's dream companion?

A *Czech Mate*

Opponent Jokes More Opponent Jokes

How did the baker put his opponent in checkmate?

with an en croissant

What do you say when your opponent resigns after you take their queen?

Sorry mate.

Exist Jokes More Exist Jokes

What is the difference between someone who worships God &amp someone who worships the sun?

The sun exists.

How do you broach the sensitive religious topic about the possibility a human soul might not actually exist?

Gingerly.

5 Year Old Jokes More 5 Year Old Jokes

How do you shoot a blue elephant?

With a blue elephant gun. You hold his trunk until he turns blue, then you shoot him with the blue elephant gun Edit: My 5 year old nephew loves this joke.

Who ate all the cookies?

5-year-old: Ninjas. Me: I didn't see them. 5-year-old: No one ever does. Checkmate.

Look Jokes More Look Jokes

Why couldn't the boy look at the Milky Way?

He was galactose intolerant.

What do you call a good looking Lebanese man?

Azif

Cookie Jokes More Cookie Jokes

What do you call a cookie without legs?

A cookie

What happens to a plate made out of cookies when you drop it?

It chips.

Beautiful Jokes More Beautiful Jokes

When a guy texts "your beautiful," reply with "my beautiful what?

then laugh and laugh and never talk to that nice idiot again.

What is Checkmate?

You tell your Wife, "I saw a lady, looked exactly like you" Wife asks, "WAS SHE BEAUTIFUL?" You cant say 'NO' You cant say 'YES' That is Checkmate!

Lady Jokes More Lady Jokes

Why are none talking in the ladies sauna?

They are sitting on their lips!

Why do all the ladies love Jesus?

spreads out arms to fullest length) Because he was hung like this.