Collapse Jokes

What did the Mexican say when his house collapsed on him?

Hey, get off me homes !

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What do you call it when a sewer collapses on itself?

Sewercide

Where does it hurt?

Me: *Points to heart* Nurse: Awwww that is so cute! Me. *COLLAPSES FROM HEART ATTACK*

What did the engineer say to the bridge after it had collapsed?

I trussed you.

Why did it take so long to find the bodies of the black firefighters after the building they were in caught fire and collapsed?

Cause the building collapsed, duh.

When did your parents divorce?

ME: No, they were hoarders, and the second floor collapsed.

What do you get if you cross a spider and an elephant ?

I'm not sure but if you see one walking across the ceiling then run before it collapses !

What did Gorbachev say when the USSR collapsed?

So ve it."

What would George Washington do if he was alive today?

Probably get suffocated in his collapsed coffin

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Point Jokes More Point Jokes

What do witches use pencil sharpeners for?

To keep their hats pointed.

How can you tell that a straight pin is confused?

Just look at it. It's headed in one direction and pointed in the other.

Second Floor Jokes More Second Floor Jokes

Why couldn't the police arrest the robber on the second floor?

Because he took the stairs.

When did your parents divorce?

ME: No, they were hoarders, and the second floor collapsed.

Parent Jokes More Parent Jokes

What did the dyslexic kid say to his parents at Christmas?

I love Satan

How do her parents punish Helen Keller?

By leaving the plunger in the toilet.

George Washington Jokes More George Washington Jokes

When crossing the Delaware River why did George Washington stand up in the boat ?

He was afraid that if he sat down that someone would give him an oar to row !

What's the difference between George Washington and Nicki Minaj?

Nicki Minaj never owned slaves.(https://www.youtube.com/watch v=Gr1p4KtgOXc)

House Jokes More House Jokes

How can you tell if a hippy came to your house?

He's still there.

What part of the house does a ghost not use?

The living room

Catch Jokes More Catch Jokes

What did the sphinx say?

What did the sphinx say when he found out the pharaoh caught him up in a pyramid scheme Egypt me!

What did the String Theorist say when his wife caught him in bed with another woman?

Wait, I can explain everything!

Engineer Jokes More Engineer Jokes

What do you do for a living?

The engineer replies " I make chips" "Oh yummy!"

How does an engineer screw a light-bulb?

He holds the light-bulb over the socket and waits for the world to revolve around him.

Hurt Jokes More Hurt Jokes

What kind of punch hurts the most?

A Sandy Hook.

Why did Freud hurt his shoulder?

He made a Freudian slip