Handyman Jokes

How did the handyman feel after going to the bar?

He was hammered.

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug

Coffee Mug

What does the handyman who has no legs wear on his head?

The handycap.

What did the handyman do... when he got his girlfriend in bed with him for the first time?

He screwed, nutted, and bolted.

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Time Jokes More Time Jokes

Who's there? Dragon Ball Z. Dragon Ball Z Who?

FIND OUT NEXT TIME ON DRAGON BALL Z

What do you say when someone dies while getting an erection?

He came and went at the same time.

Wear Jokes More Wear Jokes

What does Captain Kirk wear to the fitness center?

Jim shorts.

What do mosquitoes think of people who wear bug spray?

They are just OFF-full

Bed Jokes More Bed Jokes

Why does the ocean roar?

You would too if you had crabs on your bottom and oysters in your bed.

What is it called when 5 girls get into bed with one guy?

A "no one will ever believe me".

Feel Jokes More Feel Jokes

What feels good in the west but feels cotton in the East?

Happi-ness

Which member felt the warmest?

The conductor.

Head Jokes More Head Jokes

Why are giraffes' necks so long?

Because their heads are so far from their bodies.

What's black and white and red, and has trouble going through a revolving door?

A nun with a javelin through her head

Screw Jokes More Screw Jokes

How many boring guys does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One

What's the best thing about screwing twenty one year olds?

There are twenty of them.

Girlfriend Jokes More Girlfriend Jokes

Why wasn't Hamlet sad when his girlfriend drowned?

He was more of a necrOpheliac anyway.

How did the astronaut break up with his girlfriend?

I just need some space."

Nut Jokes More Nut Jokes

What did the web designer do when a hot girl walked up to him and squeezed his nuts?

He AJAXulated.

What kind of NUT would make a pie for THANKSGIVING?

Pecan, typically.