Hard Feeling Jokes

What did the man say to his wife when he failed to get an erection?

No hard feelings.

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What did the dog say to the vet that just castrated him?

No hard feelings.

What did the vet say to the dog he just castrated?

No hard feelings.

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Vet Jokes More Vet Jokes

Why were the vets and pounds mad?

It was raining cats and dogs

What do you call the tech. at the vets who has to give injections to cats?

Claude.

Cow Jokes More Cow Jokes

What sound do you hear when you drop a bomb on a cow?

Cowboom!

What do you tell a cow that's in the way?

Mooooooooooooove.

Castrate Jokes More Castrate Jokes

How do you castrate the pope?

Kick the altar boy in the chin.

What did the vet say to the dog he just castrated?

No hard feelings.

Feel Jokes More Feel Jokes

Where do people already feel awkward & uncomfortable?

Church " "K let's make 'em like that" -- funeral home designers

What do you call Iron Man when he is feeling sad?

A bit of a Downey

Japanese Girl Jokes More Japanese Girl Jokes

What does a Japanese girl ride?

Niisan.

Whats the worst part of breaking up with a Japanese girl?

You have to drop the bomb twice before they get the message.

Dark Jokes More Dark Jokes

Why did the wrestlers have to fight in the dark?

A: Their match wouldn't light.

How many sith lords does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They like it on the dark side.

Girlfriend Jokes More Girlfriend Jokes

Who's your Daddy?

In my excitement, I asked my girlfriend "How's your daddy " instead of "Who's your daddy " and now five hours later we're still talking about his diabetes...

How Do You Break Up With Your Girlfriend?

www.AshleyMadison.com

Erection Jokes More Erection Jokes

What is the hardest part of cuting a baby in half with a straight razor?

My erection.

What do you say when someone dies while getting an erection?

He came and went at the same time.