Mercede Jokes

What's the difference between a Mercedes and Princess Diana?

The Mercedes can easily reach 40.

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Whats the difference between a guy who has a new Mercedes and a guy who has an old Mercedes?

The guy who has a new Mercedes is rich. The guy who has an old Mercedes has been rich for a longer time.

Why did the rich guy crash his car?

He wanted to see how the Mercedes bends

How can you tell a rich Swiss from a poor Swiss?

The poor swiss washes his Mercedes by himself

What's the difference between a bag of dead babies and a mercedes?

I don't have a mercedes in my garage!

What is the difference between a Mercedes and a Lexus?

Princess Diana wouldn't be caught dead in a Lexus...

What's the difference between a Volvo and a Mercedes?

Princess Diana wouldn't be caught dead in a Volvo

What's the difference between a porcupine and a Mercedes?

A porcupine has the pricks on the outside.

What's the common thing between Mercedes and iphone 6?

Mercedes Benz...

What did Mike Meyers say to Eddie Murphy after Eddie bought him a brand new Mercedes?

DANKE!"

What's the difference between a Mercedes and a bunch of dead babies?

I don't have a Mercedes in my garage.

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6 Jokes More 6 Jokes

What's the difference between a white bodybuilder and a black bodybuilder?

A white bodybuilder has 6 packs whereas a black bodybuilder has 2 pac

How do '90s kids count to 6?

Uno, dos, tres, cuatro, cinco, cinco, seis.

Bunch Jokes More Bunch Jokes

What goes 'peck bang peck bang peck bang' ?

A bunch of chickens in a field full of balloons !

What do ya call a bunch of guys breaking into a music store and helping themselves to the stringed instruments?

A: Luters.

I Phone Jokes More I Phone Jokes

Why is Rose sad?

Because there is no Jack in iPhone 7.

What does /r/jokes and the iPhone vs FBI case have?

Both just got hacked

Dead Baby Jokes More Dead Baby Jokes

What is worse than a dead baby in a trash can?

A dead baby in 6 trash cans.

What's the difference between a dead baby and a watermelon?

Well the first noticeable difference is that the watermelon tastes better.

Sit Jokes More Sit Jokes

What's blue and white and sits up a tree?

A fridge wearing a denim jacket.

What sits in the kitchen and gets smaller and smaller?

A baby combing its hair with an apple peeler

Know Jokes More Know Jokes

What's the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa?

Santa knows to stop after three Ho's.

How did Jack know exactly where to find the goose in the giant's castle?

He had her.

Catch Jokes More Catch Jokes

Why was the man arrested at the farmers' market?

He was caught taking a leek.

Where do they send trickster tuna when they catch them?

A Tuna Chi-Cannery

Porcupine Jokes More Porcupine Jokes

What's the difference between a porcupine and a Prius?

Porcupines have pricks on the outside

What is the difference between a porcupine and a BMW?

A BMW's pricks are on the inside!