Past Jokes

Why are there so many women archaeologists?

Because women love digging up the past.

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Why are there so many Redditor archeologists?

Because loves digging up the past.

What was the ancient language Link needed a book to translate in "A Link to the Past"?

Hyruleglyphics.

What do you call a crocodile/robot sent from the future to save the past?

Termigator (jesus christ this one's even worse than the last)

What do you call presents after you've opened them?

Pasts

Why weren't you at work last week?

Me: Why are you living in the past

Why do so many girls do archaeology degrees?

Because they love digging up the past.

What do you mean I can't change the past?

logs on to Wikipedia*

What does a cranky Japanese person suffer from?

PAST: Post Atomic Stress Disorder

Why are there so many women archeologists?

Because they love digging up the past.

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Cupboard Jokes More Cupboard Jokes

What did Sean Connery say when a book from his cupboard fell on him?

I can only blame my shelf. Shout out to /r/shubreddit

What do you get if you cross a bag of snakes and a cupboard of food ?

Snakes and Larders !sna

Race Car Jokes More Race Car Jokes

What does a flower in a race car yell?

Petal to the nettle!

Why did everyone turn away when the race car drove past?

It had a SPOILER on it.

Woman Jokes More Woman Jokes

How do you make a woman drive in a circle?

Take away her rights.

What makes men chase women they have no intention of marrying?

The same urge that makes dogs chase cars they have no intention of driving.

100 Jokes More 100 Jokes

What has 100 teeth and keeps Godzilla at bay?

My zipper

What do you call 100 blacks buried up to their necks?

Afroturf.

Tin Jokes More Tin Jokes

How do you get 100 Ethiopians in a phone box?

Throw a tin of beans in there ..... How do you get them back out of it? Run past with the tin opener .....

What is it called when you throw a tin can into a recycling bin?

A recycling TIN!

Phone Box Jokes More Phone Box Jokes

How do you get 100 Ethiopians in a phone box?

Throw a tin of beans in there ..... How do you get them back out of it? Run past with the tin opener .....

What do you call an elephant in a phone box?

Stuck.

Wing Jokes More Wing Jokes

Why did the blonde jump off the cliff?

A: She thought her maxi pad had wings

What has two wings and an arrow?

A Chinese telephone

Want Jokes More Want Jokes

Why does Axl Rose have trouble getting his car fixed?

Because no one wants to feel his serpentine.

Why did the campfire turn into a forest fire?

It wanted to get off its ash.