Smoke Jokes

What do you call an alpacca that screams when it sees fire?

A smoke aLaama.

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What do you call someone who's never smoked weed?

ilLITerate

Why did the roman only smoke 490 blunts and not 500?

Because XD

Why do people find Anne Frank so attractive?

Because she is smoking hot

What do you call Harrison Ford when he smokes weed?

Han So-High"

How do you know that someone likes to smoke weed?

Don't worry they'll tell you.

What do you call a group of IT guys that smoke meth?

Geek Squad

What I say: "Does anyone need anything from the store?

What I mean: "I'm off to smoke a bowl in my car so I can deal with all of you."

What would the punishment be for smoking a joint in the times of Jesus Christ?

You would get stoned. And then get rocks thrown at you.

What did the big chimney say to the smaller chimney?

You're too young to be smoking!

Why did the religious person give up smoking?

Because God hates fags.

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Love Jokes More Love Jokes

What if loving you is gross?

That's the question.

What do you call an octopus that loves jokes?

A knock-knocktopus.

Explode Jokes More Explode Jokes

What do you call a Japanese kid the explodes?

A loli-pop

What's the part of a book that's most likely to explode?

The appendix.

Tree Jokes More Tree Jokes

What is your favorite dumb joke?

Mine would have to be Why did sally fall out of the tree? Because she had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not sally.

How do you get a one armed Canadian out of a tree?

Wave to him!

Slow Jokes More Slow Jokes

How do you get your girlfriend to stop smoking??

Slow down and grab some lube!!

Why should you slow down to let another car move into your lane?

good karma.

Pot Jokes More Pot Jokes

Why Did The Cows Go To Graze In The Marijuana Fields?

It was a case of the pot calling the cattle back...

Why did the snooker player go to the toilet?

To pot the brown.

Stop Jokes More Stop Jokes

How do you stop the neighbours kids from playing in your yard?

Molest them

Why did Hugh Jackman single handedly stop a Franciscan botanist from accidentally dropping a match in the forest?

Because only Hugh can prevent florist friars.

Fag Jokes More Fag Jokes

How did the muslim get cancer?

By smoking a lot of fags.

Why did the religious person give up smoking?

Because God hates fags.

Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What is the difference between a brick and a blonde?

If you lay a brick it doesn't follow you home.

What's the difference between a blonde and a 747?

Not everyone's been in a 747.