Sofa Jokes

Why couldn't the Buddha hoover under the sofa?

Because he had no attachments

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Why is there no sofa in the forbidden kingdom?

because Mao is more of a chair man!

What should you do if you find a 500-pound dog asleep on your bed?

Sleep on the sofa.

Why is a sofa like a roast chicken ?

Because they're both full of stuffing !

What do you get if you cross a cow a french fry and a sofa?

A cowch potato!

Why did the woman turn to her husband and say "now who the hell would dump such a nice sofa out here in the woods?

She was looking at a bear and thought it was a sofa due to the four legs.

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Leg Jokes More Leg Jokes

What did the child with no arms and no legs get for Christmas?

Cancer.

Where do you find a dog with no legs?

Where you left it

Bear Jokes More Bear Jokes

How are one out of three American Boats born?

By Sea-Section.

Why do bears have hairy coats?

Fur protection.

Hell Jokes More Hell Jokes

What's the hottest album in hell right now?

Views from the 666

What the hell did you expect for ten dollars?

Lobster "

Cow Jokes More Cow Jokes

What do you call a cow that plays with itself?

Beef Stroganoff

How do cows do math?

A cow-culator. haha haha ha ... ok, I'll leave.

Shape Jokes More Shape Jokes

What are the best kinds of speedbumps?

Orphan shaped ones.

What's square-shaped and yellow?

A yellow box

Dump Jokes More Dump Jokes

What does Madeleine McCann and Bin Laden have in common?

They both got their backdoors smashed in before being dumped in the sea

Why did the banker dump his girlfriend?

He lost interest.

Roast Chicken Jokes More Roast Chicken Jokes

Why is a sofa like a roast chicken ?

Because they're both full of stuffing !

What's the difference between roast chicken and pea soup?

I can roast chicken but I can't pea soup

Husband Jokes More Husband Jokes

What does the husband say to his wife whose nose is bleeding?

Nothing, he already said it twice.

How do you keep your husband from reading your e-mail?

A: Rename the mail folder to "instruction manuals"