Std Jokes

What do you call an STD that is contracted in your ear?

Hearing AIDS

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What's the difference between STD's and Pokemon?

I still haven't caught any Pokemon.

What do STDs and jokes have in common?

They're both easily spread.

What musical instrument do people with STDs play?

The herpsichord.

Why did the stop sign get an STD?

Because it had a 4-way.

What was the first thing Abraham Lincoln told his friends when they asked him how he got an STD?

Four whore and seven beers ago....

This joke may have profanity.

What's in an STD salad?

green pees

What do you call a hippopotamus with an STD?

A herpepotamus.

What STD does a hip black man get?

Kool-AIDs

What's the worst STD you can get from a black man?

Pregnancy.

What kind of STD does a blonde woman give you?

Herp-n-derp-es

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What kind of STD does a bird get?

Chirpies. :-)

What STD is found most commonly among lesbians?

Carpet burn

What's an STD's favorite kind of pizza?

Heperoni

What STD did Forrest Gump catch?

NSFW Jennytal Warts

This joke may have profanity.

What do you call an STD for homeless people?

Hermit Crabs

What did the doctor give the Asari with an STD?

Anti-biotics

What is the only thing more permanent than a Sharpie marker?

A STD.

What do you call a criminal with an STD?

A herpetrator.

What do you call an std that only reptiles can get?

Gatoraids.

What's the difference between a clever midget and an STD?

One is a cunning runt.

What STD did the US Soccer player get during the 2014 World Cup?

Ghana-RIO!

What STD can you catch from Mayor McCheese?

None, but you can get food poisoning.

What kind of venereal disease does a Stormtrooper get?

An AT-STD.

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Hippopotamus Jokes More Hippopotamus Jokes

Why don't you find hippopotamuses hiding in trees?

They're really good at it.

What do you call a hippopotamus in an I.C.U.?

Hippo-critical.

Kool Aid Jokes More Kool Aid Jokes

Why don't blondes like to make Kool-Aid?

They can't get eight cups of water into that little packet.

Why did the cultists drink the Kool-Aid?

To get to the other side.

Soccer Player Jokes More Soccer Player Jokes

What's the difference between a WWE wrestler and a soccer player?

A WWE wrestler will get up after faking an injury.

What does a terrorist and a soccer player have in common?

Mossack Fonseca.

Reptile Jokes More Reptile Jokes

What do you call a reptile that loves putting things in groups?

a segreGATOR

What do you call a reptile...?

What do you call a reptile who says "But Cowardly Lion......You've had courage..... This entire....Time"?

4 Way Jokes More 4 Way Jokes

Why did the Yield Sign want to divorce the Stop Sign?

He caught her in a 4-way

Why did the stop sign get an STD?

Because it had a 4-way.

Find Jokes More Find Jokes

What's the difference between Helen Keller and Susan B. Anthony?

One doesn't know her place, the other can't find it.

What powerful reptile is found in the Sydney opera house ?

The Lizard of Oz !

Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What's the difference between falling 2 ft and 200 ft?

200 ft: Aaaaaaaaa, bump 2 ft: Bump, aaaaaaaaa (Yes, it's an old, really old joke. Surprisingly haven't seen it here, yet.)

What's the difference between a politician and a flying pig?

The letter F.

Pokemon Jokes More Pokemon Jokes

Why is Pokemon Go Banned in Saudi Arabia?

Because not all Pokemon know selfdestruct.

What's the best pokemon in pokemon go?

It's Victreebel if you go to a gym you will always get a victory with it.