How do you tell the difference between a plumber and a chemist?

Ask him/her to pronounce unionized

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Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What's the difference between an Irish wedding and an Irish funeral?

One person.

What's the difference between humans and bullets?

Humans miss Harambe.

Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

What's the hardest part about being a Vegan who does Crossfit and owns a Rescue dog?

Deciding which to tell people first.

How can you tell a mortician is a necrophiliac?

He's always HARD at work.

Ask Jokes More Ask Jokes

What did the scarecrow say when asked about his job?

This job isn't for everyone, but hay...it's in my jeans"

What did the commitment averse monster truck announcer say to his girlfriend when she asked him, "When are you going to finally ask me to marry you?

SOMEDAY ###SOMEDAY! ###SOMEDAY!!

Karma Jokes More Karma Jokes

Why aren't people afraid to submit reposts?

Because there's no karma involved.

How many posters who type 'r/antijokes' on this sub only do it for karma?

Seriously, I don't know. Maybe 50?

Chemist Jokes More Chemist Jokes

How do you tell the difference between a chemist and a plumber?

Ask them to say the word, "unionized".

What happens when someone mixes Francium, Oxygen, Tungsten, and Nitrogen after it explodes?

The chemist may frown.

Plumber Jokes More Plumber Jokes

Whats a Plumber's favorite vegetable?

A Leek!

Why is lumberjack the only job with some random guy's name attached?

Why aren't plumbers called, like, toiletdougs Or crapperjoels

20 Jokes More 20 Jokes

What has everyone been using to get ice of their cars in the morning?

I've been using a discount card, but I can only ever get 20% off

How long did it take Goku to change a lightbulb?

20 Episodes and Krillin dies.

Remain Jokes More Remain Jokes

What do you call a body in a morgue which hasn't been viewed by anyone yet?

Remains to be seen.

Why did the Chinese Government cross the road?

THE PUNCHLINE OF THIS JOKE HAS BEEN CENSORED BY THE GOVERNMENT OF THE PEOPLES REPUBLIC OF CHINA, PLEASE REMAIN CALM WHILE WE WILL DEAL WITH THE OP IN A CIVIL MANNER.

3000 Jokes More 3000 Jokes

What did David Crockett say when he looked over the Alamo wall and saw 3000 Mexicans?

Hey I didn't know we were pouring concrete today.

What's the difference between 8:45 am and 10:45 am?

Around 3000 people

Himher Jokes More Himher Jokes

How many graduate students does it take to change a light bulb?

A: Only one but it may take him/her more than five years to do it.

How many Man U. fans does it take to change a lightbulb?

One to change the lightbulb and one to drive down to Kent to pick him/her up.