Why don't house painters wear wedding rings on the job?

Nobody wants to marry an underemployed alcoholic.

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Want Jokes More Want Jokes

What's the difference between an art student and a philosophy student?

A philosophy student asks you you want fries with that

How did Chad Kroeger lose a quarter?

Everyone who bought his tickets wanted their nickelback

House Jokes More House Jokes

What's the cutest part of a house?

The awning. I know, I'm sorry.

What room is missing from almost every house?

a Mushroom

Painter Jokes More Painter Jokes

How does a painter support their art in this economy?

Easel-y

What did the painter say to the paint can?

A lot of good you are . (the joke is that the paint can is empty)

Job Jokes More Job Jokes

What's awkward for a man but a normal part of the job for a lumberjack?

Morning wood.

I just got fired from my job at the keyboard factory.

They told me I wasn't putting in enough shifts.

Marry Jokes More Marry Jokes

Why did the 280-pound girl marry the 400-pound man?

She wanted a big wedding.

What are ants called when they run away very fast to get married?

Ant-elopers.

Wear Jokes More Wear Jokes

Which is the only insect that needs to wear shoes?

Mosqui-toes.

What do you call an Italian guy wearing a flourescent track suit?

A DayGlo Dago

Wedding Ring Jokes More Wedding Ring Jokes

Which one is married?

The one with the wedding ring YOU SICK-O!

Where's your wedding ring?

I said, "I had to wash my hands so I took it off and placed it on my lover--I mean your mother's kitchen counter."