Cat Bark Jokes

How to make a dog meow or your cat bark?

Freeze your dog and then take an angle grinder and use it on your dog and it Will say meeeeeow. Dunk your cat in gasoline and light it on fire and it Will say woof

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How do you make a cat bark?

Wrap it around a tree

How do you make a cat bark like a dog?

Cover it in lighter fluid and throw a match at it: "WOOF!"

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Tree Jokes More Tree Jokes

What kind of tree smells like bacon?

Original ) A Porcupine!

How did the pollock die raking leaves?

He fell out of the tree.

Wrap Jokes More Wrap Jokes

How are we out already?

ME: *hiding dog that I wrapped up like a mummy* it's a mystery I guess

What did the psychiatrist say to the man wearing nothing but Saran wrap?

Well, I can clearly see your nuts.

Dog Jokes More Dog Jokes

What does a dog like to wear when it's exercising?

Pants.

What's the difference between a dog and Windows 10?

A dog knows what is 'no'.

Tree Bark Jokes More Tree Bark Jokes

What kind of tree barks?

A dogwood!!

Why was the cat afraid of the tree?

Because of the tree bark.

Pour Jokes More Pour Jokes

What's the difference between having a badly poured draft beer and having a child with Down's Syndrome?

If the head's too big on your beer, you can blow it off.

What did David Crockett say when he looked over the Alamo wall and saw 3000 Mexicans?

Hey I didn't know we were pouring concrete today.

Cover Jokes More Cover Jokes

What do you call a retard covered in water?

Flame retardant

Where does a librarian sleep?

Between the covers. I will now show myself to the door.

Freeze Jokes More Freeze Jokes

How do you make a dog sound like a cat?

You freeze it, put it on a bandsaw and cut it; "Meoooow".

What did the Eskimo children sing when their principal was leaving?

Freeze a Jolly Good Fellow.

Cat Jokes More Cat Jokes

Why was the cat afraid of the tree?

Because of the tree bark.

What's the best fabric Softener to use on a cat?

Pounce...