Mature Jokes

How can you tell if you have a mature or an immature sense of humor?

poop.

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug

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What's the difference between a drummer and publicly traded stock?

Publicly traded stock will mature and make money.

What Austrian girls and wine have in common?

Both mature in a cellar.

What is the difference between a guitar player and government bonds?

Government bonds mature over time and earn money

What's the difference between a millennial and a mutual fund?

A mutual fund will eventually mature and make money

What's the difference between a guitar player and a savings bond?

Eventually the savings bond will mature and begin to earn money.

Why women mature faster than men?

Because men start growing breasts only after 40 years old.

What is a Mature man who likes young women?

An Inmate

What's the difference between men and government bonds?

Bonds mature.

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What starts with e, ends with e, and only contains one letter?

an Envelope EDIT: My deepest Canadian apologies to those who are calling this a riddle. I always took it as a cheesy joke

Why don't kids like cheesy jokes?

they're too mature for their taste

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What do you call a woman with one leg longer than the other?

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What's Pao's favorite Chinese dish?

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How many guitar players does it take to change a light bulb?

Ten: one to screw it in and nine to say, "Pssh, I can do that."

What do Catholics and guitar players have in common?

Neither of them practice.

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Why do bears have fur coats ?

Because they'd look stupid in anoraks !

What do you call kids born in whorehouses?

brothel sprouts!

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What kind of cheese is made backwards?

Edam.

What do you call a Mexican drowning in a vat of cheese?

Nacho problem.

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What's the difference between humor and odor?

Humor is a shift of wit...

What bleeds once a month and has absolutely no sense of humor?

Me. I'm pretty clumsy so I get paper cuts pretty regularly.

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What is a Farmer's favorite pick-up line?

Girl. You look so good that I wish I could plant you and grow a whole field of y'all!

What do you call an animal rights' activist that never grows old?

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Why did the chicken go to the car dealership?

she wanted to trade the coop for a sedan..

What's the difference between a drummer and publicly traded stock?

Publicly traded stock will mature and make money.