New Yorker Jokes

What's the difference between a New Yorker and a Canadian?

A New Yorker takes the A train; a Canadian takes the train, eh.

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How do you get a New Yorker upset about ISIS terror attacks?

Tell them ISIS are Red Sox fans.

What did the New Yorker order from the Liberian waitress?

Ebola soup!

Why did the New Yorker sleep under an oil tank?

He wanted to wake up oily.

What are all those wires?

My wireless internet." (New Yorker cartoon ideas)

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Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What's the difference between Tigger and Pooh?

I've never smeared tigger on my face

What's the difference between an art student and a philosophy student?

A philosophy student asks you you want fries with that

People Jokes More People Jokes

What do you call a group of people from Idaho?

Deydahoes.

Why am I here?

Devil: You told people you'd say hi to other people 3,789 times but only did it 4 times. Me: OK that's fair.

Canadian Jokes More Canadian Jokes

What do you call a sophisticated American?

Canadian

How do remove a bunch of drunk Canadians from the pool?

You ask them to leave.

Hold Jokes More Hold Jokes

What do you call an Irish girl sitting on a hot griddle holding a piece of cheese?

A paddy melt!!

How many mothers-in-law does it take to change a light bulb?

One. She just holds it up there and waits for the world to revolve around her.

New Jersey Jokes More New Jersey Jokes

Why did Kobe Bryant go to New Jersey after he got arrested?

Because he needed one.

Why should you never buy golf equiptment made in New Jersey?

Because New Jersey drivers are terrible

Washington Jokes More Washington Jokes

How much does freedom weigh?

A WashingTon.

What's white, located in washington and has a president within it?

Monica Lewinsky's teeth.

Play Jokes More Play Jokes

What do Mexicans play at their funerals?

Another Juan Bites The Dust

What do you get when you play a Frank Sinatra record at twice the speed?

Shrank Sinatra"

Revolve Jokes More Revolve Jokes

How many Narcissists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. But he doesn't screw it in, he just holds it and the world revolves around him.

How many twists does a feminist need to screw in a light bulb?

None. They just grab it and the world to revolve around them.