Semicolon Jokes

What's the difference between a semicolon and a cat?

One has a pause at the end of it's clause, the other has claws at the end of it's paws.

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What is the definition of a semicolon?

Something I usually have after a long night of drinking.

What happened when the semicolon broke grammar laws?

It was given two consecutive sentences.

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Pause Jokes More Pause Jokes

What's the difference between a semicolon and a cat?

One has a pause at the end of it's clause, the other has claws at the end of it's paws.

Why have a ballroom, with no Balls?

Disney's Frozen I paused the movie to tweet this...

Definition Jokes More Definition Jokes

What is the definition of gross ignorance?

A: 144 blondes.

What's the definition of a quarter tone?

A. A bagpiper tuning his drones.

Claw Jokes More Claw Jokes

What would Marilyn Monroe being doing if she were alive today?

Clawing at the lid of her coffin.

What would Marilyn Monroe be doing if she were alive today?

Clawing at the inside of her coffin.

Paw Jokes More Paw Jokes

What's the difference between a semicolon and a cat?

One has a pause at the end of it's clause, the other has claws at the end of it's paws.

Why is it hard for Chihuahuas to type on a keyboard?

They're all paws.

Happen Jokes More Happen Jokes

What happens when so-and-so step in the neutrino's urine?

He develops LEPTONspirosis.

What do you call an insect that gets exposed to radiation but nothing of consequence happens to it?

A moot ant

End Jokes More End Jokes

What starts with "W" and ends with "ife"?

Nevermind, this riddle is too easy.

Why do they say 'Amen' at the end of a prayer instead of 'Awomen'?

A: The same reason they sing Hymns instead of Hers!

Drink Jokes More Drink Jokes

Where do police put their drinks?

Copholders

Why shouldn't you drink at a math party?

Because you shouldn't drink and derive.

Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What's the difference between a truckload of sand and a truckload of babies?

You can't unload sand with pitchforks.

Whats the difference between a kink and a fetish?

A kink is something put in a hose, a fetish is something she wants to put in your hose.