Paw Jokes

What's the difference between a semicolon and a cat?

One has a pause at the end of it's clause, the other has claws at the end of it's paws.

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug

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What do you call a group of dogs?

a PAW-se

Why wasn't the cat moving?

It was on paws

What does a girl from Arkansas say when she loses her virginity?

Get off me paw, you're crushing my smokes."

What do bears and women from Arkansas have in common?

They can't stop licking their paws.

What is the difference between cats and commas?

This might be better suited for but I think its more a joke Cats have claws at the ends of it's paws commas haves pauses at the ends of its clause.

Why does a dog lick his balls?

Because he can't curve his paw into a little fist

Why did the 3-legged dog go back to Dodge City?

To see who shot his "paw."

Why is it hard for Chihuahuas to type on a keyboard?

They're all paws.

Why does he do that?

Me: He's on paws. X: ... Me: On... paws. X: I hate you so much.

What do cats and people that submit jokes with the punchline "PLAGIARISM" have in common?

THEY BOTH LICK THEIR PAWS!

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How are dogs and addicts similar?

They both have PAWS

What do you call it when a cat stops?

A: A paws!

What did the cat do when he didn't want to watch the movie?

He paws-ed it!

Why didn't the dog speak to his foot ?

Because it's not polite to talk back to your paw !

What did the cat say when he lost all his money ?

I'm paw !

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X Jokes More X Jokes

Why did the pirate date the mermaid?

He thought finding X in her algebra would lead to booty.

What did the pirate say as he was sailing through Jamaica?

X marks the pot, matey."

Group Jokes More Group Jokes

Why do teenage girls have groups in odd numbers?

Because they can't even.

What do you call a group of black criminals?

A "protest" apparently.

Lose Jokes More Lose Jokes

What do you call a chess blunder where you lose your castle?

A Rook-ey mistake.

How Are a Texas Tornado And a Tennessee Divorce The Same?

Somebody's Gonna Lose A Trailer

Arkansa Jokes More Arkansa Jokes

Why are people from Arkansas so good at Science?

Because they use the Theory of Relativity to find a partner.

Why do University of Arkansas graduates tape their diplomas to the windshields of their cars?

So they can park in handicapped spaces.

Dog Jokes More Dog Jokes

What dog wears a white coat and does science experiments?

Labs!

What do you get if you cross an agnostic, a dyslexic and an insomniac?

Someone who lays awake at night, wondering if there is a dog.

Shoot Jokes More Shoot Jokes

What did Courtney Love say before she shot Kurt?

Hole is gonna be huge."

What do you call two line dancers doing the dance Shoot the Rooster?

A. A Pair of Shoot (parachute)

Combine Jokes More Combine Jokes

What do you get when you combine human DNA with a goats?

kicked out of the petting zoo...

What do you get when you combine someone from Colorado and someone from Idaho?

A Baked Potato

Curve Jokes More Curve Jokes

Why does a dog lick his balls?

Because he can't curve his paw into a little fist

What does a lifeguard and a manager of a Curves have in common?

They both watch whales.