Weapon Jokes

What weapon does a thin pirate use?

A skinnytar.

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What do somolian pirates use as weapons?

Arrrrpg's

What is the difference between a Mechanical Engineer and a Civil Engineer?

A Mechanical Engineer makes weapons, a Civil Engineer makes targets.

What should you use to make a boat explode?

A weapon of mast destruction.

What's the difference between a mechanical and a civil engineer?

One builds weapons and the other build targets.

Why did China lose WW2?

Because their weapons were made in China

What do people who refuse to fight use as weapons?

Their pacifists

What did Pat Benatar say to the kid throwing cereal at her?

Stop using Chex as a weapon!

What weapon is most feared by knights?

A can opener.

What do you tell the teenage mutant ninja turtle Raphael when he picks up a miniature version of his weapons?

Those are the wrong Sais.

What's are pirates favorite kind of weapon?

RRRRtillary.

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What weapons do pengiuns have?

Pen-guinades.

What do you call a weapon used by a Canadian ninja?

A: Canuck-chucks.

Which weapon has the least amount of drawbacks?

A bow.

What kind of weapon does a seasoned vet use?

A salt rifle.

What is the difference between mechanical engineers and civil engineers?

Mechanical engineers build weapons. Civil engineers build targets.

What do you say to the teenage mutant ninja turtle Raphael when he is holding a miniature version of his weapons?

Those are the wrong Sais

What has 8 arms, is ominous looking and ink is its weapon of choice?

An octopus " "No Jeff, the answer is my wife's 4 divorce attorneys"

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What do you have when you have two small, green balls in your hand?

Kermit's undivided

What's the difference between Belgian waffles and American waffles?

Belgium waffles crumble in the hands of German.

Charge Jokes More Charge Jokes

How do cities decide who gets to be in charge of wastewater management?

They hold a runoff election.

How much will that be?

asks the neutron. "For you " replies the bartender, "no charge."

Japanese Jokes More Japanese Jokes

What do you get if you take the red circle off a Japanese flag?

The French flag.

What do all Japanese Airmen wear eye patches?

Because they're pirots!

Hispanic Jokes More Hispanic Jokes

Why did a Hispanic man rob a train?

He had loco motives!

What do you call a hispanic gas?

Cabron Dioxide!

Civil Engineer Jokes More Civil Engineer Jokes

What's the difference between a mechanical and a civil engineer?

One builds weapons and the other build targets.

What is the difference between a Mechanical Engineer and a Civil Engineer?

A Mechanical Engineer makes weapons, a Civil Engineer makes targets.

Lose Jokes More Lose Jokes

Why can't pirates finish the alphabet?

because they get lost at C!

Why did the dog lose the lawsuit?

It was a shih-tzu

Hold Jokes More Hold Jokes

What do you call a statue holding some Mouthwash?

A gargoyle!

How do black people tan?

Holding their hands up

Target Jokes More Target Jokes

Why are there no Wal Marts in Iraq, Iran, or Afghanistan?

Because there are already too many targets. (credit: some old veteran bum looking guy sleeping on a bench at the police station I went to today.)

Why can't a storm trooper get a girl pregnant?

Because they always miss their target!