Humor Jokes

How can you tell if you have a mature or an immature sense of humor?

poop.

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What bleeds once a month and has absolutely no sense of humor?

Me. I'm pretty clumsy so I get paper cuts pretty regularly.

What do you call a cow with no sense of humor ?

A feminist

What is the type of humor do you hate the most?

Dark humor... I hate it when black people tell jokes.

What form of humor is nonexistent in black culture?

Dad jokes

What form of humor do Dentists find most offensive?

Plaqueface

What do you call a pizza who's a DJ?

DJ Beazza Yes it's a stupid pun, but that's a good 50% of my humor, the other half being sarcasm.

What do you call cows that don't have a sense of humor?

Feminists.

How many germans does it take to change a lightbulp?

One. We are efficient and don't have any humor.

How many Germans does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Just one. They are very efficient and don't have much of a sense of humor.

What's the shortest book in the world?

Deutscher Humor!

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Why does 7 have an odd sense of humor?

Because he abused when he was younger.. it's really quite sad.

How do you describe people who tell "I see dead people" jokes?

They have a sixth sense of humor

What's a Jackhammer's Best Friend?

Cast Steel! Bahahahahah! You know! Cause it has a poor dampening value it vibrates so much! They um. They both vibrate. Well ok. One vibrates, the other reciprocates. That's kinda... Hehe. Heh. Reciprocate my humor damn it!

What are some easy pranks I can set up in his cubicle?

I don't want to go TOO over the top, and I definitely don't want to actually damage anything. But he has a pretty good sense of humor.

What's the difference between humor and odor?

Humor is a shift of wit...

What are some good conversation starter jokes you can think of?

Just some light jokes with bit of humor . Nothing too dark.

What was the humor like back then?

I was just wondering about how many jokes today maybe irrelevant 100 years into the future. To test this theory, what are the oldest recorded jokes?

What do you call corn with a sense of humor?

Laughing stalk

Who wins in a fight: Goku or Superman?

Wrong, Batman always wins.   Yes, I do have the sense of humor of a 5 year old.

What do you call cattle with a sense of humor?

A: Laughing stock.

Why are eggs so good at humor?

Because they have running yolks.

How many people with no humor does it take to change a lightbulb?

One.

What's good for the soul and rarely found in America?

A sense of humor.

What type of sense of humor does rain have?

A very wet sense of humor

What's the difference between a good joke and a bad joke?

please let me know... I have a terrible sense of humor!

What do you call cows that have a sense of humor?

Laughing stock.

What does a suicidal person say while leaving a party?

I want to hang by myself for a bit. Edit: Not suicidal. Just gallows humor.

What molecule has the best sense of humor?

A helium polymer. HeHeHeHeHe

Why don't kleptomaniacs have a sense of humor?

Because they take everything, literally....

What do you love most my natural beauty or my body?

Wife: Your sense of humor.

Why didn't Darth Vader make it as a stand up comic?

Fans thought his sense of humor was a little too on the dark side.

What is Captain Hook's favorite kind of humor?

Dead Pan.

What type of sense of humor does a dust storm have?

A very dry sense of humor

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What's the difference between a vacuum and a Harley Davidson?

The position of the dirtbag

What's the difference between a Brit and an American?

The Brit got kicked out and the American did the kicking.

12 Jokes More 12 Jokes

How many seconds are in a year?

12. January 2nd, February 2nd, March 2nd, April 2nd.... etc

How many polaks does it take to kidnap a child?

A: 12. One to kidnap the child and the remaining 11 to write a ransom letter.

Food Jokes More Food Jokes

Why doesn't your menu list prices?

Waiter: We didn't want to make you sick before the food does.

Where does the CIA buy its groceries?

Whole Foods

Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

What did the husband tell his wife to do after he slapped her?

The same thing he told her the first time!

What's worse than your doctor telling you that you have gonorrhea?

Getting the news from your dentist

Trash Jokes More Trash Jokes

What's worse than seven dead babies in a trash can?

One dead baby in seven trash cans. What's your dead baby joke

What is worse than three kids in trash can?

One kid in three trash cans

Shift Jokes More Shift Jokes

Why keyboards... Why keyboards don't sleep?

Because they have two shifts!

What did one tectonic plate say to the other tectonic plate?

Bro, do you even shift?"

Morbid Jokes More Morbid Jokes

What is the difference between black, morbid and brutal humor?

Black humor - 12 children in one trash can Morbid humor - 1 children in 12 trash cans Brutal humor - 12 trash cans in one children

What do you call a gore thriller that can't get enough funding?

A film that needs morbids.

Odor Jokes More Odor Jokes

What did the judge say when the skunk walked in the court room?

Odor in the court!!!

What was the German Shepard's defense at his Nuremberg trial?

I was just following odors."