Ill Jokes

What do you say when your ex has broken up with you?

Ill call you tomorow

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Which Norse God consistently uses VPNs?

Ill give you a hint, he remains very low-key.

What do you call a pirate's helicopter?

An Eye-patchy helicopter! . Ill show myself out.

What would you do of you found Chicago, Ill.?

Call Baltimore, M.D.

What did the tiger say to the detective?

I'm not lion. Ill be here all week...

What do you call a sick bird who has crossed a national border without consent?

An ILL-EAGLE! 2X COMBO

Why was the russian airforce less superior than their enemies?

Cause their airplanes kept STALIN!! (Ill see myself out...)

What do you call a sick dictator?

Kim Jong-ILL . . . . . Ill show myshelf out...

Why can't you run in camp sites?

Its 'ran', because it's past tents... Ill see myself out.

How does the Easter Bunny keep his ears standing straight up?

He uses Hare Spray... (Ill see myself out)

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Illness Jokes More Illness Jokes

What illness are you suffering from if you keep seeing cartoon animals who talk?

Disney spells.

What illness makes you sneeze on your laptop screen?

A computer virus!

Remain Jokes More Remain Jokes

How do you tell the difference between a plumber and a chemist?

Ask him/her to pronounce unionized

How Many Hillary Supporters Does It Take To Screw In A Lightbulb?

Why NONE of course, they prefer to remain in the dark!

Ill Eagle Jokes More Ill Eagle Jokes

What do you call a sick bird who has crossed a national border without consent?

An ILL-EAGLE! 2X COMBO

Why is it a bad idea to hunt the US national bird?

It's ill-eagle

Cure Jokes More Cure Jokes

What's the difference between eugenics and a charity marathon?

The second one's a race for the cure. Shamelessely stolen from .

What's the one thing make a wish foundation can't give you?

The cure

Terminal Illness Jokes More Terminal Illness Jokes

Why was the airport depressed?

It had a terminal illness.

What is a computer virus?

A terminal illness.

Read Jokes More Read Jokes

Why was 11 afraid of 12?

Because 12 13 14!

What book does the Queen of England read to get herself into a raunchy mood?

50 Shades of Earl Grey

Desert Jokes More Desert Jokes

Why are camels also known as Ships Of The Desert'?

Because they're full of Arab seamen.....

What do you call a waffle you drop in the desert?

San Diego San-dee-eygo sandee-eygo sandy-eggo i'll letmyselfout

Darude Sandstorm Jokes More Darude Sandstorm Jokes

What do you call a mean dust storm?

Darude - Sandstorm

What do you call the mean and dusty winds of the desert?

Darude Sandstorm