Report Card Jokes

How to scare parents?

Dad: "Can I see your report card, son?" Son: "I don't have it." Dad: "Why?" Son: "I gave it to my friend. He wanted to scare his parents."

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What did little John Cena say to his primary school teacher when she gave him his report card?

You can't C me!

What did the pirate get on his report card?

Seven C's

Why was the lesbian mad when she got her report card?

Cause she got a D

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How did the monster cure his sore throat?

He spent all day gargoyling.

Why did the American spend an entire winter in a Russian hotel?

They say he was snowed in.

C Jokes More C Jokes

Why is C afraid of D?

Because DEEZ NUTS!

What letter stands for the ocean?

The letter C.

Pirate Jokes More Pirate Jokes

What did the pirate say about the steering wheel in his pants?

Arrg, it's driving me nuts!"

What did the pirate say to his sister?

Aye sis

Want Jokes More Want Jokes

What seemed to be the parrots problem?

Prolly wanted a cracker!

What did the parrot say when he saw a duck?

Polly want a quacker!

Wife Jokes More Wife Jokes

What did the executioner say to his wife when he left?

I'll beheading out now.

What if I buried it in the yard?

me, genuinely, earlier today. Wife said no.

Steal Jokes More Steal Jokes

When did this happen ?

a) I don't know he also stole my watch.

What's the difference between a basketball player and a mexican?

Nothing, they both run, jump, shoot and steal.

Son Jokes More Son Jokes

How'd you sleep last night?

Son says: "umm... With my eyes closed " Edit: This actually happened btw. Probably funnier irl.

What did the Buffalo say to his son when he went off to college?

By son.

Police Jokes More Police Jokes

Why couldn't the police solve the case of the flat car battery?

They had no leads.

What happens when you turn a cashew in to the police?

You bust a nut