Shotgun Jokes

What does a blonde and a shotgun have in common?

You break them at the middle and load them from behind

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What sound does a shotgun make?

Cobain Cobain

What do you call a rifle that has been fired recently?

A shotgun

Why can't melons have shotgun weddings?

They cantaloupe

What'd you do this weekend?

I was shooting craps. "Oh you went to a casino " *flashback to blasting dog turds with shotgun* Um, yeah.

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Melon Jokes More Melon Jokes

Why do melons have fancy weddings?

Because they cantelope!

Why do melons always have well planned weddings ?

They can'telope !

Kurt Cobain Jokes More Kurt Cobain Jokes

How do you know Kurt Cobain didn't have dandruff?

A bit of his head and shoulders were found behind the couch.

Why wouldn't Kurt Cobain let you charge your phone at his house?

the guy likes his power chords too much.

O Jokes More O Jokes

What's the difference between O and Q?

One had to P.

What is the chemical formula for water?

Student: "HIJKLMNO." Teacher: "What are you talking about " Student: "Yesterday you said it's H to O!"

Rifle Jokes More Rifle Jokes

What did one rifle say to the other?

Me llamo es 762

What do you call a communist who's good with a rifle?

A marxman.

Kind Jokes More Kind Jokes

What do you call the belief that one kind of shoe is better than another?

Shoepremacy.

What kind of music does your mailman like?

Postrock/Postpunk

Crap Jokes More Crap Jokes

What do you call it when a dog craps on your rug?

Carpet bombing.

What would a diatomic Calcium molecule look like if existed?

Like Crap or Feces (its the same) WHY Because its Ca=Ca (equal sign is a double bond)

Beer Jokes More Beer Jokes

How do you get a Mormon to not drink all of your beer on a fishing trip?

Bring two Mormons.

How much for a beer?

The bartender replies: "For you No charge."

Checkmate Jokes More Checkmate Jokes

What do you call it when you get stuck into a shotgun wedding with a Czech?

Checkmate!

What is Checkmate?

You tell your Wife, "I saw a lady, looked exactly like you" Wife asks, "WAS SHE BEAUTIFUL?" You cant say 'NO' You cant say 'YES' That is Checkmate!