Swedish Jokes

What's the difference between a Swedish jam band and slam dunking a baby?

One's a Swedish Phish and the other's a fetus swish

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What nationality is not quite one?

Swedish

What did the failed Swedish chef say?

All that hard Bork and nothing to show for it .

What did the Swedish chef say to his girlfriend when he found out she was pregnant?

Abort - Bort - Bort!

What hood was the Swedish cholo from?

StockHOLMES!

Where does a race on the Swedish border end at?

The Finnish line.

What do Swedish people put in their coffee?

Artifical Swedeners

How do you sink a Swedish submarine?

Knock on the hatch.

What do you call a scar left by the Swedish Chef?

A borkmark.

Why do Swedish men always have stupid grins on their faces?

Because they're stupid" said her friend.

How do you catch a Swedish fish?

With a gummy worm as bait

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Who's a good example of a Swedish Spaniard?

Per Ejemplo.

What do you get when you cross a Swedish tennis pro, a computer virus, and an insatiable hunger for mort flesh?

Cyborg Bjorn Borg hosting smorgasbords at the morgue.

What do Swedish criminals say when the cops are coming?

Pork! Pork! Pork!

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Catch Jokes More Catch Jokes

How do you catch a rabbit?

You hide in a field and make carrot noises.

Which game did the cat want to play with the mouse?

A: Catch.

Swedish Chef Jokes More Swedish Chef Jokes

What did the Swedish chef say to his girlfriend when he found out she was pregnant?

Abort - Bort - Bort!

What do you call a scar left by the Swedish Chef?

A borkmark.

Race Jokes More Race Jokes

What's the difference between eugenics and a charity marathon?

The second one's a race for the cure. Shamelessely stolen from .

Why did Michael Jackson always lose in a race?

Because he always came in a lil behind.

Computer Virus Jokes More Computer Virus Jokes

What do you get when you cross a Swedish tennis pro, a computer virus, and an insatiable hunger for mort flesh?

Cyborg Bjorn Borg hosting smorgasbords at the morgue.

What illness makes you sneeze on your laptop screen?

A computer virus!

Sink Jokes More Sink Jokes

How to sink a submarine with 10 blondes in it?

You knock on the door.

What do you call a boat with a hole?

A sink.

Baby Jokes More Baby Jokes

What's worse than ten babies in one trash can?

One baby in ten trash cans.

Who's bigger?

Mr. Bigger Or Mr. Bigger's baby The baby, because it is a little Bigger.

Nationality Jokes More Nationality Jokes

What nationality are Sprinters?

They Russian. I'll also see myself out.

What are their nationalities?

Russian and Finnish!

Dunk Jokes More Dunk Jokes

How do you cure the hiccups?

Dunk your head in a bucket of water and pull it out twice.

Why did the reporter only dunk chips in the middle of the dip?

He just wanted the inside scoop.