Lesbian Jokes

How do know a job's been done by a lesbian carpenter?

There are no nails, and no screws, it's all tongue and groove!

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What do you call a lesbian with huge thumbs?

Well-endowed. http://img487.imageshack.us/img487/3628/ellenplaidshirt022ex9.jpg

What do you call a lesbian platypus?

A lickalotapus

What did the lesbian pirate say to her peg legged girlfriend?

Scissor me timbers

How do you view lesbian relationships?

1080p

What do you call a lesbian with long finger nails?

Single*.

What is the difference between a Ritz and a lesbian?

A Ritz is a snack cracker and a lesbian is a crack snacker

What's the difference between a walrus and a lesbian?

One smells like fish and has a mustache, and the other is a walrus.

What is said at the conclusion of a lesbian marriage ceremony?

You may fist the bride

Why was the lesbian nervous about her first trip to China?

All the dongs.

Why do lesbians like radishes?

Because they like to get their daikon.

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View Jokes More View Jokes

What's the hottest album in hell right now?

Views from the 666

How is a picket fence like a mini skirt?

They both protect the property but they don't spoil the view.

Know Jokes More Know Jokes

How do you know if you cat's got a bad cold ?

He has cat-arrh !

How do crows know what time is it?

They have the knights watch .

Hear Jokes More Hear Jokes

Who directed this?

HIM: "A bear attack." ME: "Never heard of him."

Why did the man bring his bed with him to the hospital?

It's because he heard hospital beds have a high mortality rate.

Marry Jokes More Marry Jokes

Why don't you marry her?

Dentist: I can't afford to. She's my best patient.

Why do so many people in the South get married?

Free shotgun

Sandwich Jokes More Sandwich Jokes

Why were the sandwich fillers eyes too close together?

Because he was in-bread.

What do you call the people who make sandwiches at Subway?

Sub humans.

Prefer Jokes More Prefer Jokes

What music do cats prefer?

Deadmau5

What do a baby and a martini have in common?

I prefer both of them shaken

Snack Cracker Jokes More Snack Cracker Jokes

What's the difference between a Triscuit and a Lesbian??

One is a Snack Cracker and the other is a Crack Snacker!!

Whats the difference between a Ritz cracker and a lesbian?

Ones a snack cracker and ones a crack snacker!

Chicken Jokes More Chicken Jokes

Why did the chicken cross the bridge?

To get away from the Turkey coop.

What do you call a chicken at the north pole?

Lost.