Military Jokes

What branch of the military are horses in?

The NaaaaayyyVY

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What do you call promoting a broom to the highest rank in the military?

A Sweeping Generalization.

What does one call an undertaker that's been drafted into the Military?

A Corpseman. Painfully obvious, yet a terrible play on the English language, I know. It was something I came up with a few years ago, for some unknown reason.

What do you call a Bronie in the military?

A GIbronie!

Why are there so many more men in the military?

Because ladies go in first.

What branch of the military did the hipster join?

The Salvation Army.

What do you call black people in the military?

Geurrilla warfare

Why did the military name it's new drone system "Caitlyn Jenner"?

Because it's unmanned

Why did the army's craftsman enact a "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" Policy?

He didn't want any glaze in the military

Why Did The Military Take Over Turkey?

To Prove They Were Not Chicken

Why don't american have a bullet train?

They use the bullets to train the military.

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What do you call a sapling in the military?

An Infantry! (Infant tree, a sapling is a baby/young tree Ah forget it!)

What does the scientist say when asked if Invisibility Cloak will be applicated by the military?

Yes, but you won't see it any time soon.

Why can't a soldier look wistfully across the horizon?

Because there are no gaze in the military

Whose the most vague person in the Military ?

General Direction.

What does the US military and a fart have in common?

Air Force

How do you know if someone was in the military?

Don't worry, they'll let you know.

What's the fastest branch of the military?

The Marines. When they retire, they're corvettes.

Why Aren't SJW's Allowed In The Military?

They are too trigger-happy.

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Plane Jokes More Plane Jokes

What did the south tower say to the north?

BRB man, I've got to catch a plane. Im soz.

Why did the terrorists have to blow up a Paris nightclub?

Because their planes kept missing the Eiffel Tower.

Join Jokes More Join Jokes

What's the difference between a brothel and a circus?

Your mother never ran away to join the circus.

Why did the chemist join the Pentecostal church?

He wanted to speak in tungsten.

Come Jokes More Come Jokes

Where do Knights get their armour?

The hardware store. One I came up with when I was about 10.

What kind of cheese gives out money?

Prova I just came up with that and feel pretty proud (:

Asians Jokes More Asians Jokes

Why can't two Asians make a Caucasian?

Because two wongs don't make a white.

How do Asians execute white people?

They cut off their heads using a Gweilotine.

Broom Jokes More Broom Jokes

How do you picture yourself flying on a broom?

A: By witchful thinking.

Why don't witches wear underwear?

So they can get a better grip of the broom. :)

Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What is the difference between an angry rabbit and a counterfeit dollar bill?

One is bad money and the other is a mad bunny.

What's the difference between a very old shaggy Yeti and a dead bee?

One's a seedy beast and the other's a deceased bee.

Veteran Aryan Jokes More Veteran Aryan Jokes

Who took care of German army dogs after the war?

Veteran Aryans

What do you call an ex-military white supremacist?

A veteran-aryan

Horse Jokes More Horse Jokes

Why did the horse feel famous on Reddit?

He was gelded.

Why did the horse get a DUI?

She had too many maretinis