Olive Jokes

What was the other reindeer's name?

Olive.

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What did the martini say when someone put a toothpick in it?

It hurts, but olive.

What did the Olive say when it fell off the table?

I'll live...

Why is there an olive in your water?

Me: What water Oh yeah this, this is definitely water.

How would you describe that green sheep?

Me: I don't know. Olive ewe Her: I knew you'd say it first! I love you too! Entrapment 101

Why don't elephants like martinis?

Have you ever tried to get an olive out of your nose

What kind of olives do I like?

Olive them

Why is it called extra virgin olive oil?

Because they grow the olives inside, away from the birds and the bees.

How did Popeye keep his tool clean?

NSFW He dipped it in Olive Oyl

This joke may have profanity.

What's a martini's favorite garnish?

Olive 'em!

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Edit Jokes More Edit Jokes

What do you call a blind, legless buck?

No eye-deer. EDIT: I totally messed this joke up. Please give me another chance with another joke

What's the difference between a saxophone and an onion?

You don't cry when you cut up a saxophone. Happy Saxophone Day Why this musical abomination deserves its own day is beyond me. Edit: beside to beyond

Extra Virgin ' Olive Oil Jokes More Extra Virgin ' Olive Oil Jokes

Where do you get 'Extra Virgin' olive oil?

Really ugly olives.

Why is it called extra virgin olive oil?

Because they grow the olives inside, away from the birds and the bees.

Touch Jokes More Touch Jokes

How do you know it's midnight at the Neverland Ranch?

The big hand's touching the little hand.

What did David say when the tourist tried to touch him?

Don't touch my marbles.

Toothpick Jokes More Toothpick Jokes

Why do we always ran out of toothpicks?

Nanny: I don't know maam. I always return it after using.

What did the martini say when someone put a toothpick in it?

It hurts, but olive.

Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What is the difference between a magician and Bernie Sanders?

The magician returns your wallet at the end of the performance

What's the difference between the 7 dwarfs and a girl's high school track team?

The 7 dwarfs are a bunch of cunning runts...

Explain Jokes More Explain Jokes

Whats does dissecting a frog and explaining a joke have in common?

Sure, you know how it works, but now it's dead.

Why do people ask "what the hell were you thinking"?

Obviously, I was thinking I was gonna get away with it and not have to explain it

Suffer Jokes More Suffer Jokes

What is it that you are both most fearful of?

WIFE: I just...sobbing...don't want the kids to suffer ME: Eels

What do you call somebody who suffers from both depression and trisomy 21?

Down's in the dumps

Grow Jokes More Grow Jokes

How many apples grow on a tree?

All of them!

What happens when a cow stops shaving?

It grows a Moostache.