Specialize Jokes

What do you call a repair shop that specializes in hearses?

A rehearsal.

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Where did Santa meet his wife?

Conjunction junction, they specialize in hooking up words, phrases, and Clauses

What do you call a German physician who specializes in the epidermis of the scalp?

Herr Doctor.

What do you call the grounds of a university that specializes in teaching neuroscience to hippopotamuses?

Hippocampus!

What is a Mathematician specializing in absolute numbers called?

A Sith.

Which bounty hunter specializes in tracking elves?

Jingle Fett

What do you call someone who specializes in trains?

A trained professional

What do you call the corner of the market that specializes in philosophy?

A Nietzsche market!

What do you call an Italian mobster who specializes in cold coffee drinks?

Al Frap-Pacino

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Special Olympics Jokes More Special Olympics Jokes

What's the difference between a Russian Potato and a U.S. Potato?

The U.S. potato can still compete in the Special Olympics.

What is better than coming second in the Special Olympics?

Not being retarded. Sorry guys. Poor taste. But it is what it is.

Gold Medal Jokes More Gold Medal Jokes

Whats better than winning a gold medal at the Special Olympics?

Not being retarded.

Why has the pope never won a gold medal?

Because he always came in a little behind.

Food Jokes More Food Jokes

What kind of food do zombies hate?

Fast food

What do dark humour and food have in common?

Only some people get it.

Hook Jokes More Hook Jokes

What do ducks get hooked on?

Quack

Where did Capt. Hook buy his prosthesis?

A. At a secondhand store.

Second Jokes More Second Jokes

How was the movie?

Brian: A real turkey. I could hardly sit through it the second time!

How do you know your boyfriend loves you?

SECOND PIGLET: He signs his letters with lots of hogs and kisses.

Russian Jokes More Russian Jokes

Why couldn't the NSA agent leave the Russian airport?

Because he got Snowden!

What do you get when you place a Russian leader on a cracker?

Putin on the Ritz.

Talk Jokes More Talk Jokes

What do you get when a deaf guy tries to talk to you at a urinal?

Wet

What did the cold pipe say to the to hot pipe?

Nothing,pipes can't talk. Thank you

Compete Jokes More Compete Jokes

What did fruit loops say when launching their product to compete with cheerios?

Toucan play at that game

Why aren't the Williams sisters competing against Michael Phelps?

Black people can't swim.