Ancient Egyptians Jokes

Why Couldn't the Ancient Egyptians Build a Plane?

Because, it wasn't very Pharoah-dynamic.

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How do you know ancient Egyptians were black?

Because they never dig up daddies.

Why did ancient Egyptians love beans?

They made Tootin' Common.

How do you know ancient Egyptians loved books so much?

Because they built their stuff with reads!

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Confuse Jokes More Confuse Jokes

How do you confuse a blind person?

Put them in a circular room and tell them to find the corner

Why was the blonde confused after giving birth to twins?

She couldn't figure out who the other mother was.

Egyptian Jokes More Egyptian Jokes

What do you call three Egyptian women in a bathtub?

Gorillas in the mist

What muscle do Egyptian soldiers generally lose control of, shortly before major battles?

The sphinxster ....

Know Jokes More Know Jokes

Why don't mathematicians ever get blackout drunk?

They know their limits.

How long has your car been doing that?

Me: Hubs: The engine smoking at a stoplight Me: I dont know, I look at my phone at lights.

Stuff Jokes More Stuff Jokes

How does Harry Houdini tell people to steal stuff?

Straight jack it.

Why won't the machines just take over already?

I'm tired of doing stuff.

Read Jokes More Read Jokes

What did Plaxico Burress say when he read Colin Kaepernick's Tweets?

Man, this guy just keeps shooting himself in the foot".

Who are some of the best readers in the world?

World Trade Center workers, some of them can read 50 stories in just 8 seconds!

Sun Jokes More Sun Jokes

Why does frost not like to lay out in the sun?

It burns too easily

Why does the sun never set on the British Empire?

Because God wouldn't trust an Englishman in the dark!

Egyptians Jokes More Egyptians Jokes

How do you know ancient Egyptians loved books so much?

Because they built their stuff with reads!

Why did ancient Egyptians love beans?

They made Tootin' Common.

Love Jokes More Love Jokes

What's the same about Mexican and Black people?

Once you've seen Juan, you've seen Jamal. (Sorry if you're offended, I love all races.)

How are monster trucks made?

ME: Son, when a monster and a truck love each oth- GF: glares ME: He's old enough for the facts, Jane