Blast Jokes

Why didn't Wilma let Fred in when he was banging at the door?

Because she was in the shower and didn't hear him because the elephant stump was on full blast.

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What did the older terrorist say to the younger terrorist before he headed out for a party?

Go on, have a blast.

Why does everyone keep saying the Boston Marathon was a tragedy?

I heard everybody had a blast.

What does an astronaut do when he gets angry?

He blasts off:

Why don't astronauts get hungry after being blasted into space?

Because they've just had a big launch.

Who makes the best Astronauts?

Team Rocket since they're always blasting off.

Why did the terrorist go to Sonic?

To have a Blast!

What'd you do this weekend?

I was shooting craps. "Oh you went to a casino " *flashback to blasting dog turds with shotgun* Um, yeah.

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Casino Jokes More Casino Jokes

Why don't they have any casinos in South Africa?

Because there's too many cheetahs!

Why don't casinos in Las Vegas hire girls from California?

Because they, like, can't even deal.

Shower Jokes More Shower Jokes

Why did France really surrender to Germany?

Just thought of this earlier in the shower... Had gas ever since.

Why shouldn't you let a Pokemon take a shower with you?

He might Pikachu.

Tragedy Jokes More Tragedy Jokes

Why is it a tragedy?

Because a Cadillac sits six.

Why does everyone keep saying the Boston Marathon was a tragedy?

I heard everybody had a blast.

Head Jokes More Head Jokes

What did Sean Connery say when his books fell on his head?

I blame my shelf

What do you call a man with a car on his head?

Jack

Astronaut Jokes More Astronaut Jokes

How do astronauts say they're sorry?

They apollo-gize.

What does an astronaut say when he's sorry?

All my Apollo-gies.

Door Jokes More Door Jokes

What do jehovah's witnesses believe in?

That I will open the door

How do you sink a submarine full of blondes?

Knock on the door.

Condom Jokes More Condom Jokes

What would have to break to give you 18?

a condom

What's the difference between a condom and a coffin?

Well, both carry stiffs, but one's for coming and the other's for going.

Let Jokes More Let Jokes

Why is it a bad idea to give Elsa a balloon?

Because she'll "Let it go! Let it go!" This joke was made up by my 5 year old nephew.

What's the difference between a Chickpea and a Garbonzo bean?

I wouldn't let a Garbonzo bean all over my face.