Mayor Jokes

What do you call a dog who got re-elected for mayor?

A dog with pawlitical experience.

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What did the kitty say when it ran for mayor??

Now, that was one politi-cat debate!

Why did the Mayor take so long to endorse a Presidential candidate?

Because he was running on CP time.

How is digging fence post holes like being the mayor of Toronto?

It goes pretty smoothly until you start hitting the rock.

How did the townspeople react when the mayor presented them with a cost efficient, vegan protein source?

They chia'd.

What did the mayor of dinosaur town say when crime increased by 50%?

This calls for Jurastic changes

Why did the chicken cross the road ?

Her: Because she had heard that the mayor was going to lay a cornerstone and she wanted to see if he could really do it.

Why didn't you stop when I shouted at you back there?

Motorist: I thought you were saying "Good morning Mr. Mayor." Cop: Right. I wanted to warn you about going too fast through the next town.

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Toronto Jokes More Toronto Jokes

Why do Newfies want Quebec to separate?

So it's a shorter drive to Toronto!

Where's the red light district in Toronto?

Behind the Maple Leafs' net.

Kitty Jokes More Kitty Jokes

What kind of cat should you take into the desert ?

A first aid kitty !

Why happened when the cat swallowed a coin ?

There was some money in the kitty !

Elect Jokes More Elect Jokes

Why are kids with DS getting elected prom kings and queens?

Either way, they're going down in history.

What's one advantage of electing a woman president of the United States?

We wouldn't have to pay her as much.

Present Jokes More Present Jokes

What's the downside of being a redneck kid at Christmas?

You only get presents from one set of grandparents.

What is your favourite type of birthday present?

Another present!

Click Jokes More Click Jokes

Which elf likes to click pictures?

sELFie

What goes: 'click' is that it? 'click' is that it? 'click' is that it?

A blind guy with a rubix cube

50 Jokes More 50 Jokes

How do you get 50 Pikachus on a bus?

Poke 'em on.

What do you call the kinkiest/nastiest move from 50 Shades of Gray?

The Gray Poupon

Townspeople Jokes More Townspeople Jokes

How did the townspeople react when the mayor presented them with a cost efficient, vegan protein source?

They chia'd.

What did the farmer say when the townspeople told him all of his cows were in town..?

I herd.

Crime Jokes More Crime Jokes

Why didn't the movie ticket get convicted of both of its crimes?

It would only admit one.

What do you call a dead baby ,who fights crime?

Miscarriage of Justice