Photo Jokes

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Why can't you e-mail a photo to a Jedi?

Because attachments are forbidden.

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What's the difference between a camera and a foot?

A camera has photos and a foot has five toes. (Told to me by a 9 year old child I work with)

Why was the photo acquitted in his trial at court?

Because he was framed!

What will they now use on photos for LGBT magazines?

an airbroosh

Whats the difference between Jesus and his photo?

It takes only one nail to hang the photo

Why are photos in Latvia always such good quality?

There's no such thing as potato quality there.

How does Big Boss store his photos?

On a Solid Snake Drive 120 gb sorry :

What is the difference between a sock and a camera?

A sock takes five toes and a camera takes photos.

What's the difference between Jesus and a picture of Jesus???

It only takes one nail to hang a photo

What would the Pilsbury Doughboy be if photos of him were constantly being put on magazine covers?

A roll model.

Where do you see yourself in 10 yrs time?

Same as now - in photos and mirrors," I replied

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Whose funeral was this photo taken at?

John, serious tone: "I dunno. Let's see who's missing" possible funniest thing john has said

What is the difference between a camera and a sock?

One holds photos The other holds five

What did one plant say to another when it dropped its camera into the sea?

Photos-in-the-seas!"

Why are you showing me photos?

I'm a dog."

What did the girl say when she saw a photo on Instagram of an attractive couple at brunch?

Bae-goals

Why did people stop printing stamps with photo of Pamela Anderson?

Banta: Because people started licking the wrong side of it for pasting them on the envelopes..

How many photos of Kanye West do you suppose Kanye West has on his phone?

More than 1,000

Why is ur wife shouting at you?

Friend: she told me to upload her photo in FB, I uploaded in OLX... Mistakes do happen

What kind of photos do turtles take?

Shellfies

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What do you call an ISIS member who loves himself?

A nISISist

What the difference between a ISIS member and a child?

I don't know, I just fly the drones.

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How do Buddhist monks send emails?

They remove all attachments.

Why didn't the Buddhist monk vacuum under his couch?

He had no attachments.

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What has an N, an I, two G's, an E, and an R and can be used to describe people of a certain color?

GINGER.

What cell phone service do Stormtroopers use?

AT & AT.

Sock Jokes More Sock Jokes

How's the baby?

Me: He keeps trying to shove socks thru the mail slot. Wife: Aw. His socks or yours Me: Socks is the neighbor's cat..

What's 12 inches long, stiff, full of sperm and can make a girl scream?

The sock under my bed. (I don't remember where I heard it. Can't claim ownership.)

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What do French people call a really bad Thursday?

A trajeudi.

What's a chiropractor's busiest day?

Throwback Thursday.

120 Jokes More 120 Jokes

What's the difference between my ex and my toaster?

It only takes 120 volts to turn on my toaster.

How does Big Boss store his photos?

On a Solid Snake Drive 120 gb sorry :

Forbid Jokes More Forbid Jokes

Why can't you e-mail a photo to a Jedi?

Because attachments are forbidden.

Why are foodfights forbidden in japanese schools?

The children always end up with lice in their hair.

Frame Jokes More Frame Jokes

What did the painting on the wall say to the cop?

I've been framed!

Why did the console gamer get a headache at the art museum?

Too many frames.