Victim Jokes

What was a doctors diagnosis of the victims involved in a pet van crash?

Coma, Coma, Coma, Coma, Coma, Chameleon

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What does Bill Cosby have in common with Ninjas?

Their victims never see them coming.

What does the son of God do when he is the victim of medical malpractice?

Jesus

Why would the Holocaust have failed if the victims were Islamic?

Because it would have been impossible to get a Muslim to take a shower.

How many Tumblr women does it take to change a light bulb?

I WILL NOT BE A VICTIM!

What was the victim of the car crash wearing?

A Casualty (Casual-Tee, as in Tee-Shirt) 100% Guraneed Originality You can know for sure I made it up because of how corny it is...

What does Dracula say to his victims?

It's been nice gnawing you.

What do you call a man with a flamethrower?

2. What do you call his first victim 3. What do you call his second victim 1. Bernie 2. Crispin 3. Ash

What did the victims of a month-delayed April Fool's prank feel?

Dismay.

Who were the fastest readers of all time?

The victims of 9/11. They went through over 87 stories in less than 2 1/2 minutes.

Why does my van have windows?

I want to make my victims feel like they have a chance.

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What did the earthquake say to all of its victims?

Oh, sorry...my fault.

Where did he get his clothes?

That's right - a victim

Who's the victim?

Battlefield: Call of Duty

What did the cannibal say to his victim before they went for a long walk?

You're gonna be pooped after this.

What did the psychopathic dry cleaner say to his victims?

DYE, DYE , DYEEEEEEE!

How did the roman cannibal feel about his victim?

He was glad he ate her.

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Fail Jokes More Fail Jokes

What's the worst thing about challenging an unjust law?

Failing to get away.

Why did the Boxer Rebellion fail?

They had no Qin

Doctor Jokes More Doctor Jokes

How much longer do I have doc?

Doctor: "Ten." Patient: "Ten what " Doctor: "Nine..."

Why are doctors always calm?

They have a lot of patients. Sorry.

Chameleon Jokes More Chameleon Jokes

What was a doctors diagnosis of the victims involved in a pet van crash?

Coma, Coma, Coma, Coma, Coma, Chameleon

What's the definition of a nervous breakdown ?

A chameleon on a tartan rug !

Time Jokes More Time Jokes

How do you know if someone has a Samsung phone without asking?

Don't worry, they've already told you the superior qualities it has over all the other smart phones by this time.

What time of day are you not able to find your watch?

4:04

Tv Jokes More Tv Jokes

Whats faster then a Aboriginal with a TV?

His son with the xbox.

What happens to the losers of the tv show The Biggest Loser?

They're made to feel like the smallest person in the world.

50 Jokes More 50 Jokes

What's not 50% off today?

Health insurance

How awesome were the 50s?

None of the girls had tramp stamps & you could smoke in hospitals.

18 Jokes More 18 Jokes

Who invented fractions?

Henry the 1/8

What has 18 legs and catches flies?

A: A baseball team

Ninjas Jokes More Ninjas Jokes

What do Japanese emperors and rappers have in common?

They're both wondering where their ninjas are at.

What does Bill Cosby have in common with Ninjas?

Their victims never see them coming.