Victim Jokes

What was a doctors diagnosis of the victims involved in a pet van crash?

Coma, Coma, Coma, Coma, Coma, Chameleon

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What does Bill Cosby have in common with Ninjas?

Their victims never see them coming.

What does the son of God do when he is the victim of medical malpractice?

Jesus

Why would the Holocaust have failed if the victims were Islamic?

Because it would have been impossible to get a Muslim to take a shower.

How many Tumblr women does it take to change a light bulb?

I WILL NOT BE A VICTIM!

What was the victim of the car crash wearing?

A Casualty (Casual-Tee, as in Tee-Shirt) 100% Guraneed Originality You can know for sure I made it up because of how corny it is...

What does Dracula say to his victims?

It's been nice gnawing you.

What do you call a man with a flamethrower?

2. What do you call his first victim 3. What do you call his second victim 1. Bernie 2. Crispin 3. Ash

What did the victims of a month-delayed April Fool's prank feel?

Dismay.

Who were the fastest readers of all time?

The victims of 9/11. They went through over 87 stories in less than 2 1/2 minutes.

Why does my van have windows?

I want to make my victims feel like they have a chance.

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What did the earthquake say to all of its victims?

Oh, sorry...my fault.

Where did he get his clothes?

That's right - a victim

Who's the victim?

Battlefield: Call of Duty

What did the cannibal say to his victim before they went for a long walk?

You're gonna be pooped after this.

What did the psychopathic dry cleaner say to his victims?

DYE, DYE , DYEEEEEEE!

How did the roman cannibal feel about his victim?

He was glad he ate her.

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Man Jokes More Man Jokes

How can you tell that Caitlyn Jenner was once a man?

Because she's better at being a woman than most women are.

What is it called when a man molests with each release?

Per version.

Son Jokes More Son Jokes

What did the overbearing mother melon say to her son and his girlfriend?

You Cantaloupe.

Why does your son call you big brother?

Because he's your mom's kid.

Child Jokes More Child Jokes

What is the difference between Reddit and children's television?

Children don't throw tantrums when there's a rerun of some content.

What is the third child's name?

Timothy.

Ninjas Jokes More Ninjas Jokes

What does Bill Cosby have in common with Ninjas?

Their victims never see them coming.

What do Japanese emperors and rappers have in common?

They're both wondering where their ninjas are at.

Shower Jokes More Shower Jokes

Why is it called Justice League of America?

Do they follow territorial boundaries? If the Kaos Kommandos start a brawl in El Paso and it rolls over into Juarez, do they say "screw it, let Justice League of Mexico handle it"? (Sorry if this isn't technically a joke; it was my shower thought this morning and I thought it was funny.)

What do comic book collectors use in their hair when they shower?

Mint conditioner.

Time Jokes More Time Jokes

What did the god of lightning say after working out for the first time?

I'm Thor

What time is it when planes start dropping engines?

Shedding season

Muslim Jokes More Muslim Jokes

What did the Muslim on a surfboard say?

Aloha Akbar!

What do you call a Muslim ganglord with a penchant for Noodles?

Ramendon

50 Story Jokes More 50 Story Jokes

Who are the world's fastest readers?

The 911 victims. They went through 50 stories in a minute. I'm so sorry

Who are some of the best readers in the world?

World Trade Center workers, some of them can read 50 stories in just 8 seconds!