Butcher Jokes

Whats the difference between a goat and a kid?

I stopped butchering goats.

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Why did the butcher get fired?

For bringing home the bacon.

Why was the Butcher depressed?

Because his life was in shambles.

How does a butcher introduce his wife to his friends?

Meet Patty"

What did Batman say when he went to the butcher?

Got Ham?

What is it that you do?

He: "I'm a butcher."

What did the butcher say when he handed his customer an empty pack of hotdogs on halloween?

Happy halloweenie

Why did the butcher die ?

Because he chopped off the wrong sausage.

What do you call it when you accidentally butcher your heifer instead of your steer?

A Ms. Steak.

Who's there ! Butcher ! Butcher who ?

Butcher your arms around me !

Who does the butcher look forward to seeing after a tough day at work?

His loving knife.

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Why do butchers avoid buying cattle from Colorado?

Because the steaks are too high.

Why do Butchers don't risk it all in life?

Because the Steaks are too high.

What did the butcher say to the cow?

I love you for your inner beauty.

Why did the butcher work extra hours at the shop?

To make ends meat.

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Die Jokes More Die Jokes

What is the point of owning a fish?

They are just furniture with the ability to die.

How is this possible?

Shannon died in a car accident.

Hotdog Jokes More Hotdog Jokes

What do cows like on their hotdogs?

MOOstard.

What do you get when you cross a hotdog and a potato?

A dictator.

Patty Jokes More Patty Jokes

What did one beef patty say to the other beef patty?

Will you be my grill friend

What do you call a woman made out of beef?

Patty

Halloween Jokes More Halloween Jokes

Why did the young ghost leave the party?

Everyone started drinking boo's. Happy Halloween!

Why was the ghost sad on Halloween?

He ain't have no boo

Salt Jokes More Salt Jokes

Why was the electrolytic solution taken to court?

It was charged with a salt.

What's the difference between LinkedIn and McDonald's?

McDonald's knows how to use salt

Work Jokes More Work Jokes

What does a lawyer wear to work?

A law-suit

How many people work in the Lada factory?

Two. One to cut and one to glue

Find Jokes More Find Jokes

How can you reduce the possibility of having an accident?

A: Be too drunk to find your keys.

What can't I find on the internet?

My keys

Ask Jokes More Ask Jokes

What do you do when your suicidal friend asks for a hi-five?

You leave him hanging....

How soon?

the frail man asked, his body trembling at every word. "In ten." "Ten what Ten years Ten-" "Nine." "Eight."