Carve Jokes

Why did I carve a heart with me and my boyfriends initials into a tree?

To sharpen the knife

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug

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What's the best way to carve wood?

Whittle by whittle.

How do you get 27 kids to carve a statue?

A: Have everybody chip in.

What do stupid kids do at Halloween?

They carve a face on an apple and go bobbing for pumpkins.

How do you start a stampede in Ethiopia?

Carve a turkey

What's brown and white and flies all over?

Thanksgiving turkey when you carve it with a chain saw!

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Statue Jokes More Statue Jokes

What do you call a statue of Jesus made out of cigarettes?

Holy smokes.

Why is it a bad idea to get in a relationship with a statue?

Because it's not going anywhere.

Apple Jokes More Apple Jokes

How do you get the most apples at Halloween?

Take a snorkel.

What do you call a booth babe at Apple's events?

ICandy

Stupid Kid Jokes More Stupid Kid Jokes

What do you call a stupid kid in pre-school?

Names.

What do stupid kids do at Halloween?

They carve a face on an apple and go bobbing for pumpkins.

Thanksgive Turkey Jokes More Thanksgive Turkey Jokes

How does Vladimir Putin like his Thanksgiving turkey?

Nuked

What's brown and white and flies all over?

Thanksgiving turkey when you carve it with a chain saw!

Good Way Jokes More Good Way Jokes

What is the best way to speak to a ghoul?

A: From a long ways away.

What's the best way to capitalize on an opportunity?

ON AN OPPORTUNITY

Face Jokes More Face Jokes

How do make a woman blind?

Stick a car windshield in front of her face.

Whats the difference between chinese people and racism?

Racism has many faces

Ethiopia Jokes More Ethiopia Jokes

What's Sad About Lunch in Ethiopia?

There is no lunch.

How do you start a rave party in Ethiopia?

Glue bread to the ceiling.

Fly Jokes More Fly Jokes

What do cows usually fly around in?

Helicowpters and Bulloons.

What is green and flies above Poland?

Peter Pansky