Cashier Jokes

What did the duck say to the cashier after buying some red lipstick?

Just put it on my bill

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How do attractive men pay for things?

They handsome money to the cashier

What did the duck say to the cashier after she purchased some lipstick?

Just put it on my bill"

What did the cashier say after handing down a wad of currency to Dracula?

Count Dracula."

What's the difference between a Philosophy major and a cashier at KFC?

A job application.

Why didn't the cashier laugh at my joke?

It didn't make cents

What does your tattoo say?

Me: It doesn't talk. Cashier: Ya, but what does it say Me: IT DOESN'T TALK. Cashier: Ok, Ma'am.

Why did the customer slap the cashier?

Because he was checking her out.

How much for the best friend?

Manager : Sir, we've been through this, our cashiers aren't for sale.

Why didn't the cashier get the punchline?

It didn't register.

What do you say to the cashier when you're adamant about using an expired coupon?

dis counts!!

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How much is a dozen bananas?

ampnbsp And the cashier replies: &ampnbsp -Twelve bananas

How many cashiers does it take to change a light bulb?

Are you kidding They won't even change a five dollar bill."

When the cashier asks me "Is that everything?

I feel like crap inside because obviously my order didn't satisfy her.

How much does he give the cashier?

2 dollars, so he gets a quarter back.

How many cashiers does it take to change a light bulb?

Are you kidding They won't even change a five dollar bill."

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Duck Jokes More Duck Jokes

What did the mallard yell in the drive-by shooting?

Duck!!!

Why did the duck cross the playground?

To get to the other slide.

Well Jokes More Well Jokes

Which fruit can't get married?

A can't elope. Or better yet None of them because of the lgbt movement.

What do you call an Eastern European cashier?

A Checkoutslovakian. (Better said than read)

Bill Jokes More Bill Jokes

What did the duck say when he bought lipstick?

Put it on my bill

Why did Timmy fall off his bike?

Because Bill threw a mattress at him.

Manager Jokes More Manager Jokes

Why do managers bring suitcases along to away games?

So that they can pack the defence!

Which one is the 'in' door?

Let me show you", says the manager, and 'e walks in.

Apple Jokes More Apple Jokes

What do Oranges and Apples have in common?

They're both orange except for the Apple.

What do you call it when you drop an apple on the ground?

A fruit by the foot

Money Jokes More Money Jokes

What do you call a fish that's worth a lot of money?

A goldfish!

When I was young I wanted to date a doctor for money. Can you believe how superficial I was?

Now I would date him for the prescriptions.

Grocery Bag Jokes More Grocery Bag Jokes

Whole Foods Cashier: Do you have your grocery bags?

Me: Kidding At $6 an apple you should drive them home and make an apple pie for me.

What is the difference between michael jackson and a grocery bag?

One is white, plastic, and dangerous for your kids to play with and the other holds your groceries

Talk Jokes More Talk Jokes

What's even more impressive than a talking dog ?

A spelling bee!

Why are people afraid to talk to black people?

Their scared they'll say something nigative