Chuck Jokes

How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?

A whole chuck-load.

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What would a woodchuck do if a woodchuck could chuck wood?

Go chuck itself of course.

Why are people without converse shoes dangerous?

Because they own none chucks.

How do the Chinese select their baby names?

They chuck a tin can down the stairs Ping Wong ching Pang

How much wood can Chuck Norris if Chuck Norris could chuck wood?

Chuck Norris would just stare at the wood, and it would chuck itself out of fear.

How much Norris?

Tongue twister) How much Norris could Chuck Norris chuck, if Chuck Norris could chuck Norris

How many nuns can a nunchuck chuck if a nunchuck could chuck nuns?

Nun.

Why are there no Chuck Norris knock-knock jokes?

Because Chuck only has to hit the door ONCE.

How many nuns would a nunchuck chuck if a nunchuck could chuck nunes?

None.

What's up, Chuck?

Not much, but my name's not Chuck" *vomits*

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Stare Jokes More Stare Jokes

How do you know if an introvert likes you when you're talking to them?

They'll stare at your shoes instead of theirs.

What do you call a hen staring at a lettuce?

A chicken Caesar salad.

Poison Jokes More Poison Jokes

What sort of perfume do snakes prefer ?

Poison by Christian Dior !

What's that funny taste?

Definitely not poison. Have another slice!

Fight Jokes More Fight Jokes

What do you call an aardvark that's just won a fight?

A well 'aardvark!

Why did the vengeful fireman lose his job?

He tried fighting fire with fire.

Beaver Jokes More Beaver Jokes

What did the beaver say to the tree?

It's been nice 'gnawing' you!

What did the beaver say when he fell in water?

Dam it.

Tongue Twister Jokes More Tongue Twister Jokes

What's a tongue twister?

When your tang gets all tongueled up.

How much Norris?

Tongue twister) How much Norris could Chuck Norris chuck, if Chuck Norris could chuck Norris

Light Bulb Jokes More Light Bulb Jokes

How many Borg does it take to change a light bulb?

All of them.

How many mosquitoes does it take to screw in a light bulb?

2...and don't ask me how they got in there. (My 87 year old grandma just told me this one)

Save Jokes More Save Jokes

Why isn't the guy who wrote "Danger Zone" and the Saved by the Bell theme very active on social media?

He forgot his Loggins

Why was Simba unable to save his dad in the Lion King?

He couldnt Mufasa enough.

Dam Jokes More Dam Jokes

How much wood does a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck chuck could chuck wood?

None because only beavers give a dam.

How bad is it when a nations power crisis can only be solved by a couple of hydroelectric plants?

Two dam bad! (OC!)