Frenchman Jokes

What's the difference between Frenchmen and some toast?

You can make soldiers out of toast!

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What is the life motto of a Frenchman?

No gain no pain.

How many Frenchmen does it take to stop a Semi Truck?

Apparently, 84 isn't enough.

What do you call ten Frenchmen who stand in front of their goalie for 90 minutes?

Dix.

What do you call a Frenchman wearing sandles?

Philippe Philoppe

What do you call a Frenchman wearing sandals?

Philippe Philoppe.

What did the Frenchman say after 80?

Blaze it.

How many Frenchmen does it take to defend Paris?

Nobody knows because they've never tried

What did George Takei say to the attractive Frenchman on waterskis?

Eau myyyyyyyy....

How many Frenchman does it take to defend France?

I don't know. They've never tried.

What did the Frenchman say when he saw a dirty toilet?

Eau de Toilette! (eww, the toilet)

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What do you call a frenchman in the World Cup Final?

A referee

How do Frenchmen share files?

Pierre to Pierre.

What did the redneck say to the Frenchman?

You don't speak English fourchette!

What is your funniest joke about the French?

Mine is this: How do you pick out the Frenchmen in a room full of naked soldiers? They're the ones with sunburned armpits.

What did the Frenchman yell on the roller coaster?

Yes!

How many Frenchmen does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Just one to hold it in place while the rest of Europe runs circles around it.

Why did the Frenchman not want two eggs?

Because one egg is un oeuf.

What do you call a Frenchman in Colorado?

A French Fried

What do you call a Frenchman that wears sandals?

Phillipe Floppe Courtesy, my Neuroscience Prof.

When does a Frenchman get his morning wood?

A bonne heure.

Why was the Frenchmen racist?

Because he was a bigette.

How many Frenchmen does it take to guard Paris?

No one knows, it's never been done before

How many eggs does a Frenchman need?

One, because that's an Oeuf.

How did the Frenchman get turned on?

He French-kissed a power outlet

What do you call a Frenchman that's been attacked by a bear?

Claude

Why did the Frenchman not want two eggs for breakfast?

Because one egg is un oeuf.

What do you call a Frenchman in sandals?

Philippe Philoppe.

What the difference between... a dead dog in the road and a dead Frenchman in the road?

There are skid marks in front of the dog.

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Oeuf Jokes More Oeuf Jokes

What does an egg say when it gets punched in the stomach?

Oeuf!

How many eggs does a Frenchman need?

One, because that's an Oeuf.

Gain Jokes More Gain Jokes

Why do volleyball player want to join the armed forces?

For the chance to gain some experience in the service.

How did robbers gain entry to steal from Miley Cyrus?

They came in like a wrecking ball.

Attack Jokes More Attack Jokes

Why doesn't ISIS attack Israel?

Same reason children don't attack their parents...

Why US didn't attack India, after twin-tower incident, looking for terrorists ?

Because it didn't happen in 7/11

Try Jokes More Try Jokes

Why were the Chinese trying to light a bbq grill out in the rain?

Because it was raining cats and dogs. :D

What would she do for $20?

Wasn't there a joke before posted about asking what a girl would do for $20 or something A dirty joke I'm trying to find it but I can't....

Un Jokes More Un Jokes

Why did the Frenchman not want two eggs for breakfast?

Because one egg is un oeuf.

Where does Napoleon live/Ou Napolon habite-t-il?

Dans un bon-apartement.

80 Jokes More 80 Jokes

What did the Frenchman say after 80?

Blaze it.

Why do the French get high so fast?

Because they'll reach 420 before anyone else. Explanation: 80 is quatre-vingt in french and quatre=4 and vingt= 20.

Blaze Jokes More Blaze Jokes

What did one monochromator say to another?

Hey, wanna get blazed?

What did the Frenchman say after 80?

Blaze it.

Turn Jokes More Turn Jokes

Why do they call me the fireman?

Cause I turn on the hoes

Where do you think you're going at this hour?

gun hangs head & turns around