Neckbeard Jokes

What's it called when a fedora wearing neckbeard gets sick?

M'alady

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What do you call a city full of neckbeards?

M'tropolis

What do you call someone who commits piracy?

Neckbeard the pirate

What happens when a neckbeard takes drugs?

They start tipping balls.

How does a neckbeard make a scotch egg?

He has to Breddit

What's a Neckbeard's favourite curry?

Chicken tikka m'sala

What did the neckbeard say when he looked in the mirror?

M'self

What did the neckbeard say when he was punched in the throat?

M'Larynx

What does your mother and a neckbeard have in common?

They both love Ten D's

What do neckbeards like to spread on their toast?

Marma'lady

Whats a Neckbeard's favorite city in Spain?

M'drid

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What is Reddit's favorite pirate?

Neckbeard

What did the neckbeard say while giving the eulogy for his extremely flatulent friend?

Rip in peace

What do you call a dating app for neckbeards?

Tipper.

Who's a modern pirate for the 21st century?

Neckbeard!

What did the neckbeard say to the mosquito?

M'laria

What's a Neckbeards' favourite colour?

M'genta

What did the guy with a neckbeard say when he had to mail something twice?

REPOST!"

Why don't neckbeards hit on people with heart conditions?

Because people with heart conditions take beta-blockers.

What Greek tragedy was written by a neckbeard?

Tips fedora "M'dea."

What does the neckbeard say when asked what he did last weekend?

M'laundry."

What's the most common illness affecting neckbeards?

M'laise.

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Greet Jokes More Greet Jokes

How do sheep greet each other at Christmas ?

A merry Christmas to ewe

How does a viola greet a relative?

Cello!

Happen Jokes More Happen Jokes

What happens when you heavily water farmland?

The plot thickens.

What happens when Santa get stuck in a chimney?

He gets claustrophobic!

M'laysia Jokes More M'laysia Jokes

What's a fedora tippin neckbeard's favorite country?

M'laysia

What's a neckbeard's favourite country?

M'laysia

Hispanic Jokes More Hispanic Jokes

What did the Hispanic Fireman name his twin sons?

Jose &amp Hose-B

What do you call a hispanic man who spilled his nachos?

A messycan

Job Jokes More Job Jokes

Why did Ted get fired from his job?

Because he would only do the minimum?

How do know a job's been done by a lesbian carpenter?

There are no nails, and no screws, it's all tongue and groove!

Find Jokes More Find Jokes

How many blondes does it take to change a light bulb?

They don't change it, they just take forever to find where to fit the batteries

Why did the walrus go to the Tupperware party?

To find a tight seal

Quit Jokes More Quit Jokes

Why did the programmer quit his job?

Because he didn't get arrays.

How does a neckbeard neurologist address a Hispanic midwife who can't quit her job?

M'doula obligada.

Good Day Jokes More Good Day Jokes

Why is Valentine's Day the best day for a celebration?

Because you can really party hearty!

What's the best day of the week to marry your gaming console?

Wednesday