Neckbeard Jokes

What's it called when a fedora wearing neckbeard gets sick?

M'alady

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What do you call a city full of neckbeards?

M'tropolis

What do you call someone who commits piracy?

Neckbeard the pirate

What happens when a neckbeard takes drugs?

They start tipping balls.

How does a neckbeard make a scotch egg?

He has to Breddit

What's a Neckbeard's favourite curry?

Chicken tikka m'sala

What did the neckbeard say when he looked in the mirror?

M'self

What did the neckbeard say when he was punched in the throat?

M'Larynx

What does your mother and a neckbeard have in common?

They both love Ten D's

What do neckbeards like to spread on their toast?

Marma'lady

Whats a Neckbeard's favorite city in Spain?

M'drid

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What is Reddit's favorite pirate?

Neckbeard

What did the neckbeard say while giving the eulogy for his extremely flatulent friend?

Rip in peace

What do you call a dating app for neckbeards?

Tipper.

Who's a modern pirate for the 21st century?

Neckbeard!

What did the neckbeard say to the mosquito?

M'laria

What's a Neckbeards' favourite colour?

M'genta

What did the guy with a neckbeard say when he had to mail something twice?

REPOST!"

Why don't neckbeards hit on people with heart conditions?

Because people with heart conditions take beta-blockers.

What Greek tragedy was written by a neckbeard?

Tips fedora "M'dea."

What does the neckbeard say when asked what he did last weekend?

M'laundry."

What's the most common illness affecting neckbeards?

M'laise.

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What do Islamic McDonalds employees wear?

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I don't know but he can conquer poland really fast.

What fabric is worn in Soviet Russia?

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Why did the girl quit her job at the donut factory?

She was fed up with the hole business.

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Juno

Why is Paris the city of love?

Hard P and a soft A. Modified from comment section of reddit

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What do you call a drunk who happens upon the scene of a crime?

an innocent bystumbler

What happens when you put the energizer bunny's battery's in backwards?

He keeps coming and coming and coming.

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What do you get from a drunk chicken ?

Scotch eggs !

How does a neckbeard make a scotch egg?

He has to Breddit

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Who was the most active of the chinese khanes?

Ginseng khan I am in a silly mood. Have a good day

Who's to say tomorrow won't be the best day of your life?

A statistician.