Dad Joke Jokes

What is a dad joke?

Punchlines that got married and settled down.

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What do you call a dad joke in Jamaica?

Dreadful.

Why is a giraffe's neck so long?

Why is a giraffe's neck so long? Because his neck is way up here! (Dad Joke)

Why couldn't Mark think of a dad joke?

Mark is black.

What do you call the field of study for dad jokes?

ence

Where do Polar Bears keep their money?

In the Snowbank. My first post is a dad joke LOL

What do you call a guy who likes telling "dad jokes"?

A "groan" man...

What's the difference between Bad Jokes and Dad Jokes?

One starts with B and the otber starts with D

What do you call something that's impossible due to physics?

Physics-ly impossible. There's your dad joke for the day.

What does a snowman say to his son on his birthday?

dad joke) Happy Brr-day son!

What's the best part about living in a black family?

You never have to hear a dad joke. Edit. Just thought of this at work one day hope it's not a repost

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Where do salt lovers go to pray?

OC The taberNaCl. (Sorry..) (X-posted to dad jokes.)

What do dads never forget to include in their "dad" jokes?

PUNctuation Okay, I'll leave.

What's that difference between a pun and a dad joke?

Dad jokes are punnier.

Why do they call "roach-clips", "roach-clips"?

because potholder was already taken. I know it's like a venn diagram of drug jokes and dad jokes.

What is the one thing batman and superman don't have to worry about?

Dad Jokes.

What do you call a Mexican melon?

A cantelopez! Came up with this on all by myself. I'm a new Dad, so I feel as if I've significantly leveled up my Dad Joke ability.

When does a joke become a dad joke?

When it becomes apparent.

Why are “Dad Jokes” so good?

Because the punchline is apparent.

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Pun Jokes More Pun Jokes

What are some towing related jokes i can impress my car club coworkers with?

I've already got that the frog called our car club to get toad, but that's about where my puns end.

Why don't kleptomaniacs ever get puns?

The take everything, literally.

Kind Jokes More Kind Jokes

What kind of cat should you take into the desert ?

A first aid kitty !

What kind of people are always in a damn hurry?

Russians

Forget Jokes More Forget Jokes

What animal never forgets national tragedies?

the nine-elephant

How many years before we forget if 9/11 was in '00 or '01?

15 or 16

Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

Why wasn't the patient concerned when she was told she had a brain tumor?

The doctor said it was all in her head

What do you tell a conductor when they lose control of their orchestra?

Go Bach and get a Handel on it!

Start Jokes More Start Jokes

Why did the pig go in the kitchen?

To start some bacon

How many black people do you need to start a riot?

Negative 1.

Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What is the difference between a thief and a church bell?

One steals from the people the other peals from the steeple.

What's the Difference between a Girl and a Woman?

Prison

Response Jokes More Response Jokes

When you ask me a question, would you prefer the blank stare or the eye roll as a response?

I like to be prepared.

What did the sophisticated cow say in response to another cow's joke?

That was very amoosing"

Humphrey Jokes More Humphrey Jokes

What do you call a camel without humps?

Humphrey.

What do you call a camel with 3 humps?

Humphrey. (I was told this joke by an actual dad, it was his response to one of my jokes)