Forest Jokes

What does a mathematicion find in a forest?

A natural log.

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What do you need to poop in the forest?

Toiletries

Why does Pinnochio always get an erection when he's in a forest?

Because he has a woodpecker!

How do really crazy people get through the forest?

Via the psycho path.

What is the wettest animal in the forest?

The raindeer.

What's the difference between Gordon Ramsey and a run in the forest?

Ones a pant in the country the others a...

What did the lumberjack say to the trees?

Run, Forest, run!

Where would you find more Leifs than in a forest?

Valhalla.

Why did the mother bear ask the baby bear to wear shoes before he ran through the forest?

Because he was barefooted!!!

How do crazy people go thru the forest?

They take the Psycho path.

What do wolves say when you yell barba streisand in the forest?

uuuuuUuuuUUUUuuuuuuuUuUUUuuuuuuuuuU

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Why does the forest stink during a storm?

Because the trees break wind.

How does an insane man get through the forest?

By taking the psychopath. hhhhehehhehe good one right? yeh? no..? ok.

How far can you walk into the forest?

Halfway, when you walk further then you will walk out of the forest! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAH

How does Luke Skywalker get through the forest?

Ewoks

What does Johnny Depp yell when a tree falls in the forest?

Timbuuuuuurrrrrrrrton!

How do spies send secret messages in a forest?

A: By moss code.

Which film star is always jumping around the forest?

John Treevaulter.

How Do Crazy People Go Through The Forest?

They Take The Psycho Path

Why was the ladybird kicked out of the forest?

Because she was a litter bug.

What do you call a fallen tree in a forest?

Natural log. Sorry about the math joke.

When two bears asked a pastor to marry them in the forest, what did he say?

Hold on, let me get my bear rings."

What is the poorest tree in the forest?

The burr-oak tree.

Why did Hugh Jackman single handedly stop a Franciscan botanist from accidentally dropping a match in the forest?

Because only Hugh can prevent florist friars.

What do you call a man of high authority, stoned out of his mind strolling along in the forest?

Hiking

What do you call an agreement between forests?

A treety

Which way do insane people take when they go through the forest?

A: The psycho path.

How does a crazy person walk through the forest?

He takes the psychopath.

How do crazy people make it through a forest?

They take the psycho-path.

What did the doe say as she came out of the forest?

I'll never do that for 5 bucks again.

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What kind of pants does the Pink Panther wear?

Denim Denim Denim Denim Denim Denim Deniiiiim

What kind of pants do you buy for your pet Chihuahua?

Shorts!

Lumberjack Jokes More Lumberjack Jokes

What did the lumberjack say to the trees?

Run, Forest, run!

Why are lumberjacks bad at online video games?

Because their connections are so weak they are always logging out.

Ask Jokes More Ask Jokes

Why shouldn't you ask Jon Snow what time it is?

Because his watch has ended.

How many Canadians does it take to change a light bulb?

Just two. One to politely ask and the other to politely help.

Pinnochio Jokes More Pinnochio Jokes

Why does Pinnochio always get an erection when he's in a forest?

Because he has a woodpecker!

What is every young ladys ultimate Disney fantasy?

To sit on Pinnochios face and hope he tells lies.

Escape Jokes More Escape Jokes

How did the Nucleus escape from prison?

through the cell wall.

Why is Daniel Radcliffe celebrated and worshiped in Judaism?

Because he's the only one who escaped the chamber.

Shoe Jokes More Shoe Jokes

How can you tell when an accountant is extroverted?

He looks at your shoes while he's talking to you instead of his own.

What are a plumbers least favorite kind of shoe?

Clogs.

Wear Jokes More Wear Jokes

Why did the parrot wear a raincoat ?

Because she wanted to be a Polly unsaturated !

What do mosquitoes think of people who wear bug spray?

They are just OFF-full

Run Jokes More Run Jokes

What is the difference between Stephen Hawking and his E-Wheelchair?

If you repair both, the E-Wheelchair is the only thing running again

What language does robot Marco run on?

Rubio on rails