Paul Jokes

Which do you want to hear first?

Paul: I have good news and bad news. Which do you want to hear first? Michael: The good news. Paul: The good news is that I have no bad news.

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What do you call it when Paul scores?

Paulinating.

How did Paul, the octopus, originally die?

Torres went and asked Paul proudly, "How many goals will I end up with after thia this World Cup " Paul died laughing.

What is everyone writing songs about?

John: revolution Paul: forgiveness George: true love Ringo: hmm, a submarine or maybe an octopus

Which England player keeps up the fuel supply?

Paul gas coin!

What did Mrs Revere say when Paul got on a gorilla to warn the farmers that the British were coming?

Paul stop monkeying around!

What do you get when you put Ryan dunn and Paul walker in a porshce?

Dunn Walking!!!

Why did the sweet scented man called Paul change his name to Saul?

He liked the P, but preferred the essence the change.

What did Simon's dad, Paul, say to his son to encourage him just before he went to compete in the National Leg Breaking Championships?

Have a good one, son."

What did everyone think?

STEVE: PAUL: JANE: SARAH: MARK: DAVE:

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Know Jokes More Know Jokes

How many republicans does it take to fix a problem?

No one knows. It's never happened.

Why won't the Alzheimer's patient pay attention to you?

Because he doesn't know the time of day.

Use Jokes More Use Jokes

Why dont they use phone books in China?

Because they have so many Wing's and Wong's That they might Wing the Wong Numba!!!

How much do used batteries cost?

Nothing, they are free of charge.

Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What is the difference between the deflate gate controversy and my wife?

Only one shows an interest in the balls.

Whats the difference between an easily offended person and a gun?

A gun actually does something when triggered.

Flame Jokes More Flame Jokes

What's the difference between a ginger girl and a vampire?

One bursts into flames in the sunlight, and the other is a vampire.

What idiot invented fire blankets?

You'd think they'd be hot enough from the flames.

Leg Jokes More Leg Jokes

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a pool?

Bob.

What do you call a guy with no arms or legs in a high school?

Names

Stop Jokes More Stop Jokes

What's the difference between a cow and September 11?

You stop milking a cow after 10 years.

What is the best way of stopping infection from witch bites ?

Don't bite any witches !

Want Jokes More Want Jokes

What's blue, standing in the kitchen?

STFU, I can paint my wife any colour I want!

Why did the Buddhist monk refuse Novocain?

Because he wanted to transcend dental medication.

Paul Mc Cartney Jokes More Paul Mc Cartney Jokes

What's Paul McCartney's favourite food?

Maccaroni

How did Paul McCartney get Linda pregnant?

C Moon