Waitress Jokes

What did the waitress say to the customer after she forgot his Miso soup?

A: uh, me so sorry.

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug

5.0

Coffee Mug

When can you tell your waitress is having a bad day?

When she has a tampon behind her ear and she can't find her pencil.

Where do one-legged waitresses work?

IHOP. Tipping your waitress takes on a whole new meaning.

What's the difference between a waitress and your mom?

A waitress leaves me alone after I give her the tip.

Why was the United Nations concerned when the waitress dropped the platter on Thanksgiving?

It meant the fall of Turkey, the ruin of Greece, and the breakup of China.

Why do waitresses hate mohels?

Because they never leave a tip.

What's the worst part of giving a magician a ride home?

When you get there, you turn into the driveway. Ba-dum-bum! Don't forget to tip your waitress!

What do you get when you drop a piano in a coal mine?

A flat minor. Night... Don't forget to tip your waitress

When a waitress asks me if I want soup or salad, I always ask "who's in charge of tossing the salads here?

Then I frown & order the soup.

How do you know your waitress is having a rough night?

She's got a tampon behind her ear and she can't find her pen.

What did the redditor do at the restaurant when he was done with his meal?

Tips waitress*

Couple's Daily Question Mug

5.0

Coffee Mug

Why do waitresses love serving men in fedoras?

If you're nice to them, their tipping intensifies.

How much is a soft drink ?

Waitress: Fifty cents. Girl: How much is refill Waitress: The first is free. Girl: Well then I'll have a refill.

How would you like that cooked?

gets right up in waitresses face* With frickin fire, obviously

What's the difference between a waiter and a waitress?

The size of the tip.

What did Johnny Cash say to the waitress after he got sick at a Mexican restaurant?

I've bean everywhere, ma'am!

You might also enjoy:

Tip Jokes More Tip Jokes

What is the number 1 rule at a computer bar?

Always tip your server.

Where do one-legged waitresses work?

IHOP. Tipping your waitress takes on a whole new meaning.

Soft Drink Jokes More Soft Drink Jokes

I got hit in the head by a soda can, but it didn't hurt that much...

It was a soft drink.

What soft drink do pigs like best?

Root beer.

Cent Jokes More Cent Jokes

What did the clerk say to the customer who tried to buy a candy bar with plastic quarters?

This is non-cents!

What did Abe Lincoln say when he was arrested?

I'm-in-a-cent!

Turkey Jokes More Turkey Jokes

What the hell is this?

Turkey bacon. *throws tray against wall* I'm hungry! Not desperate!

Why did the turkey get ejected from the soccer game?

He had tripped a fan.

United Nations Jokes More United Nations Jokes

What's the difference a teckel and the United Nations?

There's none. They both have big hearts but a short reach.

Why was the United Nations concerned when the waitress dropped the platter on Thanksgiving?

It meant the fall of Turkey, the ruin of Greece, and the breakup of China.

Mom Jokes More Mom Jokes

How are neutrinos and i alike?

Were both constantly penetrating your mom

What do your mom and the Baltimore Police have in common?

They both like giving nickel rides to black men!

Miso Jokes More Miso Jokes

What the japanese version of mission impossible?

Miso impossible

Why does Jesus like Japanese food?

Because he loves miso

New Yorker Jokes More New Yorker Jokes

What did the New Yorker order from the Liberian waitress?

Ebola soup!

What are all those wires?

My wireless internet." (New Yorker cartoon ideas)