Dragon Jokes

What species are the best rappers?

Dragons, because they're always spittin' fire.

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What's the best part about Dragon Ball Z?

Find out in the next episode of Dragon! Ball! Z!

What's a Dungeons and Dragons player's favorite rap group?

D12

What does Santa do to dragons?

He "sleighs" them.

What shampoo do dragons prefer?

Head & Smolders

What is the difference between dragons and dinosaurs?

Dinosaurs aren't old enough to smoke. Told to me by my niece at christmas.

What do good dragons read when they are pregnant?

How to Train Your Dragon. Good parenting, that is.

What do Scrooge McDuck and dragons have in common?

They love to swim in gold coins.

What was it called when the dragon from The Hobbit was thrown out a window?

The Defenestration of Smaug.

What do Super Mario Brothers, and relationships have in common?

Sometimes you have to slay a few dragons before you get to the princess

Why are dragons so tired?

Because they fight knights!

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How do you get dragon pee?

Drop your catheter bag.

What do you call a dragon that can't sit still?

A wiggle wyrm.

What's the first step of fire safety?

4-year-old: Stay away from dragons. Me: 4: Me: Well, obviously.

Why did the dragon go to jail for farting?

Arse-on. **Cough Cough** I'll see my way out.

What did the dragon say as he entered the party?

Hey, how are you *Alduin*

What do you call a parsnip riding a dragon?

A parsnip.

What do you want for Christmas?

Me: a dragon! Santa: noo, be realistic Me: a girlfriend Santa: * cough * what color do you want your girlfriend

Whatsapp?

He winked at me, I should send him a dragon head." "No babe, this calls for a full dragon."

How do dragons in Antarctica stay warm?

They always have several lairs.

What do you get when a dragon sneezes?

Out of the way. Thanks League smh

How to Train Your Dragon 2' Me: Friend: Me: to what?

Friend:

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Head Jokes More Head Jokes

Why didn't the Cancer Cowboy head out West?

He was afraid of Chemo-sabe.

What did the barber say to the Potato?

You've got eyes on the back of your head!"

Smoke Jokes More Smoke Jokes

What do ducks smoke?

Qwack

What does a 12 year old redneck girl say when she loses her virginity?

Get off me dad, you're crushing my smokes!

Dragon Milk Jokes More Dragon Milk Jokes

Where do you find dragon milk?

Short legged cows

What do you get from a short-legged cow?

Dragon milk!

Sleigh Jokes More Sleigh Jokes

What does santa do with a lazy reindeer?

Sleighs 'em

What does Santa listen to while delivering presents?

sleigh-er

Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What's the difference between healthcare.gov and Derrick Rose?

Healthcare.gov was broken and now it works.

What is the difference between a bag of cocaine and a four year old?

Eric Clapton wouldn't drop a bag of cocaine out the window

Good Jokes More Good Jokes

What's the best part about taking advice from r/relationships ?

You'll never have to worry about being in a long-term relationship.

What's the difference between Donald and a piece of fruit?

Oranges have thick skin. Let the downvotes fly, people! You've only got one! Edit: Did not expect this joke to get this good of a reception. Thanks, guys!

Seven Jokes More Seven Jokes

Why are setups to jokes so important?

because seven ate nine.

Why were the Seven Dwarfs kicked out of the bar?

Because they were Miners... XD

Lightbulb Jokes More Lightbulb Jokes

How many Economists does it take to change a lightbulb?

Depends on the supply and demand curve

How many Arians does it take to change a lightbulb?

A: None: Arians aren't afraid of the dark.