Middle East Jokes

I originally thought that the black rock gets wet, but it was brought to my attention that the Red Sea is in the middle east, so it prob'ly starts a holy war!

What do you call innocent women and children dying in the middle east?

Freedom

Why aren't there any Walmarts in the middle east?

Because there's Targets around every corner.

Why can't there be peace in the Middle East?

It IS what it IS.

Who says Jesus couldn't perform miracles?

He managed to find mates named Matthew, Mark, Luke and John hanging around in the Middle East.

What do you call a witness to an event in the Middle East?

A Dubaistander. Yeah I thought of it myself.

What do you call a research facility in the middle east?

Darpa Darpa

Why won't A Flock of Seagulls perform in the Middle East?

Iran so far away

What do they call spiders in the Middle East?

Iraqnids

What do you call spiders in the Middle East?

Iraqnids. Yep. An original.

Why do people regard the middle east as the holy land?

Because they're constantly drilling for oil.

Why are there no Wal-Marts in the middle east?

A: Because there are too many Targets

What's the most disappointing country in the Middle East?

Oman

What's the most dangerous bar to go to in the middle east?

The allahu ak-bar

Whats Kim Kardashian and the Middle East got in common?

Both are covered in oil, huge, and been invaded by the West.

When was pasta introduced to the Middle East?

when someone fed a genie alfredo

What phrase is a compliment in America, but an argument in the Middle East?

No, YOU the bomb.

Why can't there ever be peace in the Middle East?

We can't even get FIVE DENTISTS to agree on a toothpaste. That's why.

What do you call Call Of Duty in the middle east ?

Tuesday

Why is the middle east the best place to open a store at the moment?

Because business is booming.

What do they call Counter-Strike in the Middle East?

Tuesday.

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Argument Jokes More Argument Jokes

Why shouldn't you ever have an argument with Mobius?

Because they're always so one sided!

What's 8 feet tall, covered in fur, and walks around the Himalayas undermining your arguments by attacking your character?

The Adhomineminal Snowman

Peace Jokes More Peace Jokes

Why do you want to be Jedi?

Imagines using 'the force' to steal everyone's cats and building a cat army To keep the peace

What were the martyr's last words?

I believe in peace in our time

Exploder Jokes More Exploder Jokes

What do you call a Mexican girl who converts to Islam?

Dora the Exploder

What is the most popular kids show in the Middle East?

Dora the EXPLODER

College Jokes More College Jokes

Where do skunks go to college?

P.U.

Why isn't there a college in the world of Harry Potter?

Because even Magic can't pay your college Loan

Pee Jokes More Pee Jokes

What can 5 men do that 5 women can't do?

Pee in a cup.

What did Charlie Bucket say when Willie Wonka peed on him?

I've got a golden tinkle in my eye...

Dora Jokes More Dora Jokes

Where in the hell are Dora the Explorer's parents?

Do they know she's riding a damn crocodile into a volcano

What is the most popular kids show in the Middle East?

Dora the EXPLODER

Da Jokes More Da Jokes

Who was that coughing in the background?

Me : Oh, that was Denise. Dad: Oh, da' niece I thought it was da' nephew. Buh dum tsssssssss

What does DMX say when he has trouble putting on a hoodie?

WHERE DA HOOD WHERE DA HOOD WHERE DA HOOD AT?

Bug Jokes More Bug Jokes

Why did the blonde call an exterminator?

Her computer had a bug...

Whatcha inventing?

I call it a picnic. It's a meal but outside with bugs and a high risk of bear attack." "Can I bring my kids " "Sure."