Broom Jokes

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Why was the broom late to the meeting?

It over swept

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How do you pick up my ex girlfriend?

With a broom and a dustpan.

What do you call promoting a broom to the highest rank in the military?

A Sweeping Generalization.

Why don't witches wear underwear?

So they can get a better grip of the broom. :)

What's the Difference Between Guts and Balls?

Guts is coming home late from the bar, drunk as a skunk meeting your wife at the door with a broom in her hand and asking her if she's still cleaning the house or going out for a ride. Balls is coming home late from the bar, drunk as a skunk with lipstick all over your face and the scent of women's perfume all over you, meeting your wife at the door and stating, "You're next, chubby."

What do you say when you see two cleaning ladies making out in public?

Get a broom.

How do you stop your bacon from curling in the pan?

Take their little stones and brooms away!

What noise does a witch make when she's flyin around?

BROOM BROOM BROOOOOOOM

What happens next?

The broom gets sweepy.

Why did the guy kick the broom out of his house?

It swept with his girlfriend :P

Why do witches go commando when riding around on their brooms?

Better grip. Happy Halloween :)

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Why did the broom take a nap?

It was sweepy.

What do an eagle and a broom have in common?

They both fly but the broom doesn't.

Why is there a broom in the driveway?

me: So your mom doesn't have to borrow the car

Why don't witches wear underpants?

To get a better grip on the broom

What does a witch do if her broom is stolen ?

She calls the flying squad !

What did the young witch say to her mother ?

Can I have the keys to the broom tonight !

What do you say to two dust particles making out in the street?

Get a broom, you two.

What does a witch get if she's a poor traveler?

Broom sick.

How do you picture yourself flying on a broom?

A: By witchful thinking.

How can you tell when witches are carrying a time bomb?

You can hear their brooms tick!

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How do you keep Canadian bacon from curling in the pan?

Take away its brooms.

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Why dont witches wear underwear?

So they can get a good grip on the broomstick

Why don't black girls wear underwear to cookouts?

To keep the flies off the fried chicken.

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Why were my balls wet?

cause i dipped em' in the wishing well! LOL

Why do doctors slap babies bums when then are born?

Because the balls fall off of the stupid ones.

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Which states is Bernie most popular in?

Denmark, Sweden and Norway.

What two states are opposites?

A: Maryland and Misury

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Why couldn't Susie ride the swings?

A: Because she has no arms! Knock knock. Who's there Not Susie!

How many aardvarks can ride on an elephant?

Six... three on the back and three in the trunk!

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What kind of bar do fish go to?

A sand bar.

What do ghosts order at the bar?

Sam-BOO!-ca

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What do you give a kid with no hands for Christmas?

Doesnt matter, he'll never unwrap the gift

What phone etiquette?

You hand me your phone, you better believe I'ma hurry & scroll through as many pics as I can before you notice.

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Why is a laundromat a really bad place to pick up women?

Because a woman who can't afford her own washing machine won't be able to support you.

What are you looking for buddy?

Normal day at the office, when one guy notices his coworker distraught. He goes over to his cubicle and sees him looking for something on the floor. They spend half an hour looking for it, when the guy starts picking his nose:

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How did Jeffrey Dahmer make alphabet soup?

With 26 characters he met at a party.

Why should I let you into heaven?

Me: Once a coworker said "supposably" 7 times in a meeting & I just let her StP: Get in here