Chinese Man Jokes

What's the difference between a Chinese man and a lobster under a bus?

Nothing. They're both crustacians.

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How Long is a Chinese man?

Its his name.

How do you blind a Chinese man?

lay floss over their eyes

What Does A Chinese Man Need When Taking his Dog Out?

Oven mitts.

How does a Chinese man start a religious video?

Press pray.

What do you call a Chinese man allergic to dogs?

Starving.

Why did the Chinese man tell a joke?

Just China be funny.

Why did a chinese man ride a bike to the brothel?

To get laid.

What did the Chinese man give his daughter?

A clothes hanger.

Which one is the odd one out; a Crab, a Tuna, a Chinese man run over by a bus or a Lobster?

A tuna, because the rest of them are crustaceans.

What do you call a Chinese man with a pet cat?

A vegetarian.

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What do you call a Chinese man with one foot?

Taiwon Shou.

When did the Chinese man know it was time to go to the dentist?

Tooth hurty

What did the Chinese man say when Winter came around?

Reddit snow, reddit snow, reddit snow!

What do you call a Chinese man with a video camera?

Phil Ming

What doesn't belong in this group, A lobster, an octopus, a crab, or a chinese man under a bus?

The octopus, obviously, the three others are crustaceans.

How do you make a Chinese man no longer Asian?

Just spin him around in circles until he's disoriented

What do you call a Chinese man with one leg shorter than the other?

Li Ning

How many Chinese men does it take to make a Smartphone?

I dunno, ask the Kids.

Why did the Chinese man fall down the stairs?

He was shot in the face.

How do you know if a Chinese man has robbed your house?

Your homework is done, your computer is upgraded, and two hours later, he's still trying to back out of your driveway.

What do you call a Chinese man with a bad internet connection?

Hi Ping

What do you call a Chinese man with a bad sense of direction?

Wong Wei

What did the Chinese man say when he found out his mother died?

I can't bereave it!

What did the Chinese man say when ophthalmologist told him he had a cataract?

No, I have a Rincoln Continental!*

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Daughter Jokes More Daughter Jokes

What did the dad say when his daughter gave him gravel for his birthday?

Thanks for sediments

What did the radiographer call her daughter?

Imogen

Tooth Jokes More Tooth Jokes

What do you get when you line up 12 girls from Kentucky?

A full set of teeth.

Which two letters are rotten for your teeth?

D K

Bus Jokes More Bus Jokes

What do you call an Arab man who drives a bus?

A bus driver.

What drives you?

Me: The bus mostly Interviewer: I mean what motivates you to get out of bed in the morning M: missing the bus

Lobster Jokes More Lobster Jokes

Why was the lobster arrested?

Because he was always pinching things.

What's the difference between a lobster and a Japanese woman run over by a steamroller?

One's a crustacean and the other is a crushed Asian.

Lay Jokes More Lay Jokes

What do you get... ... when you cross an insomniac, a dyslexic, and and agnostic?

Answer(/s "Someone who lays awake all night wondering if there really is a dog")

What did the Hammerhead shark say to his buddies when he got laid?

Nailed it.

Vegetarian Jokes More Vegetarian Jokes

How did the cannibal turn over a new leaf?

He became a vegetarian.

What do Native Americans call vegetarians?

Poor hunters

Oven Mitt Jokes More Oven Mitt Jokes

What Does A Chinese Man Need When Taking his Dog Out?

Oven mitts.

What do Koreans need when they take out the dog?

Oven mitts

Foot Jokes More Foot Jokes

Why do you fight using only your feet?

Oh, y'know. For kicks.

Why did the duck stick his leg into a computer?

He wanted to have webbed feet.