Toast Jokes

What's the difference between Frenchmen and some toast?

You can make soldiers out of toast!

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Interactive Joke of the Day Mug
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What did Shakespeare spread on his toast?

Blue Sonnet

What do astronauts put on their toast?

Space Jam.

Why did the plane crash?

Because the pilot was a loaf of bread! Now he's toast

What do termites put on their toast?

Door jamb.

What does the Queen put on her toast?

Maamilade! Tada....... anyone? Anyone? I'll get my coat

What do neckbeards like to spread on their toast?

Marma'lady

What do you get if you put morphine on your toast?

Crumfortably Numb!

What did Jesus want when he appeared on a piece of toast?

Miracle whip.

How do you start a rave in Africa?

Glue a piece of toast to the ceiling

How do al-Qaeda like their toast?

Bean-laden

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How does Darth Vader like his toast?

On the dark side.

What if they found the face of Jesus in a piece of toast but it was *actually* Jesus?

This is my body, I'm nice with jam."

What kind of cheese?

Me: "American..." Her: "Want it toasted " Me: "I'll just make it myself."

What do you call a piece of toast on the ceiling?

An Ethiopian rave.

What s the difference between toilet paper and toast?

Toast is brown on both sides.

What happened at the cannibal's wedding party?

They toasted the bride and groom.

Why did the boy feel warm on his birthday?

Because people kept toasting him!

What do you call the outer edge of a piece of bread that has been toasted?

Crusty

What would Ed Sheeran taste like on a piece of toast?

gingerbread

How do you start a rave in Uganda ?

Glue a piece of toast to the ceiling

Did you hear about the bread factory burning down?

They say the business is toast.

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Space Jam Jokes More Space Jam Jokes

What do astronauts put on their toast?

Space Jam.

What does a astronaut put in a sandwich?

Space Jam

Coma Jokes More Coma Jokes

What do you call a super soldier that is in a coma?

A genetically modified vegetable

What award did the kid in a coma for six weeks win?

Atrophy.

Termite Jokes More Termite Jokes

Where did Noah keep his termites?

In a plastic bag.

Why did the termite got divorced?

Because she ate the secretary.

Iraqi Jokes More Iraqi Jokes

What did the Iraqi boy say when his dad forgot his rucksack?

Baghdad!

How do you play Iraqi bingo?

F18...B52...F18

Side Jokes More Side Jokes

Why did italy cross the road?

To switch sides

How do you know the rules of football was written by an Italian?

You switch sides at half time.

Like Jokes More Like Jokes

What's everyone's problem with euthanasia?

I like little asian kids

How does Thor's brother like to party?

He likes to keep it pretty Lo-key

Bowl Jokes More Bowl Jokes

What do you call a bowl on the internet?

Ebola

How do you get a Baby in a bowl? How do you get it out?

How do you get a baby in a bowl? With a mixer. How do you get it out? "With nachos.

Helen Keller Jokes More Helen Keller Jokes

Why did Helen Keller fail her road test?

Because she was a woman

Why was Helen Keller a terrible driver?

Because she was a woman