Slice Jokes

What did the oven tell the slice of bread?

You're !

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How many babies does it take to shingle a roof?

It depends on how thinly you slice them.

What is a mathematician's favorite food?

A slice of Pi.

How many Mexicans does it take to pave a driveway?

Six, if you slice them thin enough.

Why did the crab take the last slice of pizza?

Because he's shellfish!

What has a slice of burnt toast and a pregnant girlfriend got in common?

In both cases you wish you took it out a few seconds earlier.

What do u call an ethopian with a slice of cheese on his head?

A quarter pounder with cheese.

What do you call a baby seal between two slices of bread?

A clubbed sandwich

What do Mexicans use to slice pizza?

Little Caesers

Why do Italians carry slices of turd in their wallets?

For identification.

What's the difference between a sliced up body and a new BMW?

I don't have a new BMW in my garage.

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How do you greet a slice of bread in Germany?

Gluten tag! Ba-dum tss.

Who's there ! Buddha ! Buddha who ?

Buddha this slice of bread for me !

What's the difference between a slice of toast and the French?

You can make soldiers out of a slice of toast.

How many men does it take to wallpaper a bathroom?

A. Three if you slice them very thinly.

What do you call food between two slices of bread?

a sandwich

What do you get when you slice ice cream?

Slice cream! ... I think I'll join the reposting group now...

What's that funny taste?

Definitely not poison. Have another slice!

How many men does it take to wallpaper a feminists house?

Only one, but you have to slice him REALLY thin!

How do you start a rave in Uganda?

Tape a slice of bread to the ceiling

What did one slice of bread say to the other at the end of a game of chess?

It's stale, mate."

Why didn't the cheese get sliced?

It was destined for grater.

What do you call a slice of bread from another country?

An immigraint.

When is a birthday cake like a golf ball?

When it's been sliced.

What's the difference between a slice of toast and an Iraqi..?

You can make soldiers out of a slice of toast

Why did the pilot crash the plane?

Because he was a slice of bread

How many black people does it take to shingle a roof?

One....but you gotta slice him reeeeeaaaalllllll thinnnnnnnnnnnnn.....

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What do you call a baby seal between two slices of bread?

A clubbed sandwich

What's a caveman's favorite lunchtime meal?

A club sandwich.