Attract Jokes

Why are TV's attracted to people?

Because we turn them on. / /

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug

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Coffee Mug

How can you attract a group of like minded friends?

This clique bait will shock you!

What are peas attracted to?

Chickpeas

Why was the monkey attracted to the paint?

Cuz it was yellow and appealing! Sorry if this is bad. Seen too many of the same jokes here and I wanted to add an original joke.

What do Canadian women put behind their ears to attract men?

Their ankles!

Why was Betty Boop never attracted to Mickey Mouse?

She's only attracted to colored guys.

Why do people buy smart cars?

Because opposites attract.

Why do people love their smartphones so much?

Because opposites attract. (Told to me by 2 students today, loved it!)

What's the best way to attract a pervert?

The NSFW tag, you freak

This joke may have profanity.

Why did the polish person marry someone from the other side of the country?

Because opposite poles attract

Why were the Persians attracted to the Anatolian Greeks?

Because they were Ionic.

Couple's Daily Question Mug

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Coffee Mug

What did the one electron say to the other when it asked it out on a date?

Get outta here, I'm not attracted to you!

Why do men like smart women?

A. Opposites attract.

What attracted you to our company?

Well, I heard you pay money in exchange for work

Where's my Spiderman costume?

I want to wear it to the science museum "In your closet, why " 9: DUH. To attract radioactive spiders!

Why were all the ladies attracted to Jesus?

Because he was hung like this. (Hold your arms out wide)

Why are all the ladies attracted to Voldemort?

Because of his hex appeal.

Why do all black people go to heaven?

The Son is attracted to black

How did the Royal Navy attract so many recruits?

They were impressive!

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Cashier Jokes More Cashier Jokes

How much is a dozen bananas?

ampnbsp And the cashier replies: &ampnbsp -Twelve bananas

How do attractive men pay for things?

They handsome money to the cashier

Money Jokes More Money Jokes

How can a can you double your money?

By folding it in half.

Why does Sean Connery have no money and a beard?

Because he's no good at shaving.

Mummy Jokes More Mummy Jokes

Who does a dead pharaoh talk to?

His mummy.

What do mummies like to listen to on Halloween?

Wrap music

Ankle Jokes More Ankle Jokes

What does a blonde put behind her ears to look attractive?

Her ankles.

What did the cannibal coach yell when his player twisted his ankle?

Wok it off! Wok it off!

Man Jokes More Man Jokes

What is strong enough for a man but made for a woman?

The back of my hand...

Why did the man cry when he was cutting up onions?

Onions" was his dog... D:

Hot Wheel Jokes More Hot Wheel Jokes

What do you call an attractive person in a wheel chair?

Hot wheels.

What do you call Stephen Hawking rolling away from an explosion?

Hot wheels (First joke, hope you like it.)

Mickey Mouse Jokes More Mickey Mouse Jokes

Why did the witch keep turning people into Mickey Mouse?

She was having Disney spells.

What kind of mouse walks on two legs?

A: Mickey Mouse Q: What kind of duck walks on two legs A: They all do!

Canadian Woman Jokes More Canadian Woman Jokes

What's the difference between a Canadian woman and a moose?

50 pounds and a flannel.

What do Canadian women put behind their ears to attract men?

Their ankles!